About

The one thing you need to understand about The Angry Black Woman is that just because I’m angry doesn’t mean I hate everything. You need to get that in your head right up front.

This blog is anti-racism and anti-sexism. It’s anti-prejudice of all kinds, but I focus mainly on racism and sexism because I am a black woman.

There are three bloggers on this site. All of us are angry, black, and female. Only one of us is the Angry Black Woman.

Why am I angry? Lots of reasons. The aforementioned racism and sexism. The way that our culture perpetuates racism and sexism then lies about what it’s doing. The fact that minorities, poor people, immigrants (both illegal and legal), and other marginalized parties are still treated like the gum on the shoe of the white, male power structure in this country and yet we’re all told that things are getting better. Things are not getting better.

This blog is a safe space for talking about these and other related issues. Safe spaces need to be protected. Not from people who disagree, but people who abuse. I won’t tolerate abuse here. Because I’m angry.

It’s true that the Angry Black Woman is a negative stereotype. Black men don’t like us, white people fear us, and non-angry black women wish we would stop being so loud. Anger isn’t going to solve all of the world’s problems, true. Anger is sometimes an unhealthy emotion. Sometimes it’s not. We sometimes need to get angry to propel us toward positive change or to stop injustice and oppression. We can’t stop being angry until the fight is over. And the fight is far from over, kids.

Before you go commenting on this blog, I suggest you check out the Required Reading. It’s required for a reason. I also suggest you check out the Rules, because whether you break them in ignorance or not, you’ll still be treated the same way.

186 Responses

  1. I couple of years ago i began a blog – (Angrybitch) for a number of reasons mostly because I am a Latina that lost her job (journalist) to white male privelege -at a progressive rasio station no less. Oh yeah, being menapausal helped too…
    At any rate, I find you words, thoughts and intelligents FUCKING GREAT -Necessary, brilliant -Like getting oxygen after being locked in a dank suffocating cave.

  2. My experience at this place compelled me to write a book “White liberals and their racism” and why they just don’t get it. I wanted to create an atmosphere where activists of color could speak freely -about their experiences with white liberals and the internalized racism -and the struggle to deal with people in progressive movements that really have not unlearned their racism…It’s a subject that no one wants to deal with…

  3. I just got here. But I heart you! I just wanted to show some support and tell you to ignore the hell out of those horrifyingly stupid commenters that just want to piss everyone off. YOU ROCK.
    Sincerely,
    AWW

  4. Wow, This website makes me sad…..

  5. Its not white people you need to be focusing on.

    Distribution of single-offender victimizations, based on race of victims, by type of crime and perceived race of offender – Year 2002
    Offender victim Estimated number of victimizations (1)
    Crimes of violence- (3)
    Offender/victim
    White Black 100 111
    Black White 466 205
    Black Black 460 388

  6. hey ther, firstly i thought id clear this one up, im a white male, im 18 years old. an i found ur blog whilst looking for a word to descrobe people who are scared of black people. i thought your reasoning of ABW was completely relevant and true to modern day life, unfortunatly! However, i was wondering as to whether u think white people being scared of black people is racist, as i find myself being accused of being racist myself when i am genuinely scared of black people due to a few bad experiences with black people, im not saying all black people are the same or are all bad people, as i have friends who are black. however, i do often feel intimidated by black people who i am unfamiliar with!

  7. Until very recently I was a high school teacher in the city of Philadelphia.

    Generally, I always cut young Black girls some slack for having some ‘tude because I realize that Amerikkka is very hostile to Black women, and a pro-active attitude is simply par for the course for young Black girls. They really won’t be able to get on without having a facility for being assertive, aggressive, or even hostile. They have absolutely no choice.

    My only problem was that a goodly number of them (I taught ninth grade, english) hadn’t learned how to turn it off so I could teach them. Sometimes this did develop during their time with me and other times, not until later (if ever, I didn’t always see them again). Still, I think that being patient with them for the ‘tude was fair, because I know they need to ‘try it on’ being young people who haven’t hit all the walls their mothers have. Yet.

    Live loud, ABW.

  8. Be as angry as you need to be.

    Hell, I’m misinterpreted as angry when adjectives like “well-spoken”, “thoughtful”, or simply “correct” are better suited.

    I’ve been misinterpreted as being violent when all I’ve done was ask a question which was seen as a veiled threat.

    I’ve been called the Ugly American when some white man has decided that me not agreeing with his spin on the world is racial or cultural intolerance.

    How can you not be angry at times in a world that sees us as one-dimensional and often useless, unattractive and stupid? I’m glad that right now I’m abroad and just have time to look at the US from a different perspective (it ain’t pretty, for the most part.)

    I’m glad I found your blog!

  9. I just found your “Monday Debate: What is racism?” post. You mention that if we’d like to continue the discussion we should email you. I can’t find your email address, so I’m assuming either you don’t want it up on your site or I’m too dumb to find it, but I do have some questions, and I know a trick to making scones. If you ever have the time and the interest, maybe you could email me? I’ll make another assumption that you can see my email….

  10. Do your thing. It’s a beautiful thing, after all. :)

    And “Dreson,” you’re like me! When I get sad, I read stats, too! So many people use comfort food, but that shit gets old, right?

  11. boy, white privilege sure comes in handy. dealing with cops, judges, pretty much any kind of authority figure – everything’s just so much easier. yes, i’ve had many ocassions to be thankful for my white privilege. of course there’s a down side: angry black women sometimes hate you. but it’s not really that much of a problem – generally the most they’ll do about it is talk at you, and half the time they don’t even do that, they just stew silently! it’s pretty easy to ignore.

    actually, i’m angry too. not at angry black women, but at suits, bureaucrats, petty tyrants, money-grubbing bosses, lying politicians, and the like. of course, i’m not angry on quite the same basis as an angry black woman might be, god forbid, since i’m a totally different type of person who couldn’t possibly relate to the kinds of problems faced by black women, exclusively, from condi rice on down.

    what are we angry people to do? is blogging really enough to release all that anger? i’ve tried blogging, and i’ve tried rioting, and i have to say it’s no contest. however, rioting unfortunately tends not to be 100% effective. is there a better way, more satisfying than blogging and yet more effective than smashing things and fighting the cops?

  12. say it loud… you’re funny! hahahahahahahahahahaha *continues to point and laugh for a while*

  13. Haha this may pose as some clarification for the less-informed “so to say?”…

    I have a direct question miss “ABW” and I’m not trying to “butt heads” with you, but why do you need to specify that you’re an “angry black woman”? I mean, I myself am an “angry guy”, but I don’t really feel the need to add race into it. So my question is, why is there a need to put race into the picture?

  14. It’s NOT fear of blacks. Many whites just have experience that says many balcks have no boundaries and will destroy themselves and everything around them. They’ll kill over a dispute over a quarter or something minor, like a girlfriend. Whites don’t normally want to die over a minor stuff. Plus, whites don’t have the support in prison that blacks have. I call that thinking smart, not fearful.

  15. I just happened to find your blog because it’s on the front page of the site as blog of the minute. I think an Angry Black Woman is an extreme turn-on and an articulate one is engagement-ring-worthy. But seriously, we live in a country that excludes across the board. I will never fall for the semantic trick of someone saying “you shouldn’t say Black Power” as if adding “Black” to any positive phrase somehow makes it evil and dirty. Ask if it’s ok then to say “white power” and I’ll show graphic examples of how that phrase is accompanied by hate, death, and attempted genocide… so no it’s not ok. Anyway… nice blog ; )

  16. Careful how you group folks. I’m part white but my heritage is Native American and I can match you point-for-point in reasons for being pissed off at white folks in this country.

    In this country it’s the “us vs. them” mentality that perpetuates racism. If anyone has any right to be pissed off at white folks in this country its me. But I have let it go and learned to live in harmony with all races, including the white race.

    “My people” suffer the same prejudices that black people do. It just doesn’t get noticed as much because there aren’t many of us left. And, NOBODY dare begrudge us our anger for having our home flat-out stolen from us.

    But that’s history. This is today.

    None of the white folks living here today stole anything from me, or enslaved any of your people. They are all our countrymen and fellow Americans. They did not ask to be born here, and most have little control over where they live now. Yes there are ignorants who are prejudice because our skin is brown, but I don’t give them a second thought. Those I can help I do, the haters aren’t worth my time.

    Morbid curiosity led me to a KKK site the other day. I never found myself angry, and I can’t say I ‘pity’ them as most folks would. They have an agenda that they follow, just like many other political organizations. But I felt that they are fundamentally wrong in the Biblical sense.

    They feel this country was founded by white Christians? Do they think God just dropped them out of the sky? No, the “founders” of this country raped it, exterminated the natives here and imprisoned those they couldn’t kill.

    White Christians did NOT establish this country. It was a beautiful, healthy, thriving place before they brought their guns and disease. Yes, KKK, murder, disease and anger. You should be very proud of your heritage.

    Sorry for ranting, and thanks for offering this blog. I love it. Just don’t be so “black and white” OK? There are many of us “brown” folks who are also very emotional and passionate.

  17. The only thing that bugs me about things like this — despite their humor — is that you hear way more about Angry Black Women than Totally Fine And Not Very Angry At All Black Women and so White Americans, who are often trying to be considerate, approach women like mah’self with caution because they’ve been put on alert by people like you, who apparently just happen to be angry.

    Damnit.

    There are so many Angry White People, too, you know, but they seem to have died down ever since KKK went out of style. Or, they watch FOX. Yay for Bill O’Reilly.

  18. Ahh never mind ABW, I get it now

  19. There’s a book called Angry Black Woman, and there’s a website. The book is so funny and so true. There’s a section in the book that salutes Angry White Women. The quiz determines which ABW you are and tells the reader how to use ABW power in workplace and social situations without losing a job, friend, or anything else of value.

  20. Where did you publish your story? I’d like to read it. Tried googling but there’s a lot on “Angry Black Woman” that doesn’t seem to have anything to do w/ you or your blog.

  21. Yeah, I’m another angry black woman. Hope you’ve got room to accommodate me. http://plaintain1.wordpress.com

  22. you rock…

    i love people who arent afraid to speak their mind

  23. Interesting website

  24. Nice work Angry, if I may be so presumptuous as to call you by yr first name. We’re linking to you.

  25. lol Bruce. Sure, you may call me that. Most folks just call me ABW. Thanks for the Link.

  26. Hello ABW,

    Where are you geographically based?

    Ty

  27. Like I always say:

    If you’re not angry, you’re not paying attention.

  28. [...] my 11,000 hit Barack church post, a new reader graced my little blog with his opinions. Over in the About area, he asked: Haha this may pose as some clarification for the less-informed “so to [...]

  29. “However, anger can be used for good. We sometimes need to get angry to propel us toward positive change or to stop injustice and oppression. We can’t stop being angry until the fight is over. And the fight is far from over, kids.”

    And oftentimes what is called anger, is really passion. Passion to work towards justice, decency and fairness in this country.

    And many people fear that passion/anger because they themselves have so little of it. They themselves have settled for less than and second-best living.

    And the fight still rages on in America.

    The pervasiveness of racism is still there.

    It has simply morphed into a subtle and more sinister type. So subtle that it can often not be seen for the plague it always has been, for the plague it still is.

  30. Gloria Hopkins.

    I’m part white but my heritage is Native American.”

    And many black Americans have in addition to black African blood, and white rapist blood from slavery and segregation, Native American blood from the rape and enslavement of black people by the so-called Five Civilized Tribes (Cherokee, Seminole, Creek, Choctaw and Chikasaw).

    Many black people enslaved by the Cherokee were drug behind horse-back riding Cherokees who took their black slaves with them on the Trail of Tears march out of the South towards the West into the state presently known as Oklahoma.

    Many black slaves died along this forced migration as well.

    The Cherokee also fought on the side of the whites of the South in unity with the Confederacy.

    The Cherokee looked upon black people as less than by adopting the use of slavery into their society.

    So did the Seminole as well as the other southern Indian tribes.

    “Five Civilized Tribes”.

    Doesn’t sound so civilized to me.

    If they were so civilized they would not have aped the worst of the white man.

    But, I guess when you are given the choice of surviving against the white men and women who seek your destruction, and your choice is to either side with defenseless black humans (who, incidentally, have just as much right to live in this world asanyone else), or side with the white man and woman who can crush you like a fly, well………..

    The instinct for survival kicks in.

    And then and there, Native America of the American South, made their choice.

    Go hand in hand, and participate in the destruction of black people by adopting slavery and doing to black people what white people did to black people under white America’s enslavement of black human beings:

    -Work black women and men as animals as if they were beasts of the field
    -Take from black people their labor freely and offer no compensation for it.
    -Rape, defile, debase and debauch black women and young blacks girls, because, hey, they are not fully human, they are just animals, because the white man and woman said it was so
    -Treat black men and women just as viciously as white people did during slavery. And why not? They couldn’t possibly be human. The white race said so, so ease and salve the conscience by convincing yourselves (Five Civilized Tribes), that is was alright to enslave your fellow human beings.

    Yes, white peole aren’t the only people who have “native blood” flowing in their veins.

    Many black people do as well.

    And it got there the old-fashioned copy-the-white-race way:

    Via rape and sexual coercion.

    Only thing is, there are many black peiple who do not recognize the Indian blood anymore than they reocgnze the white blood.

    Rapist blood, no matter what type it comes in is still rapist blood.

    I’ll acknolwedge the black blood just fine.

  31. This “Civilized Tribes” vs. Freedmen debacle ticks me off to no end. When Native Americans scream about injustice, blacks are the first ones there to the defense, to help out. And they want to just negate people that have been members for 140 in the tribes? Quote “Don’t let these black freedmen take advantage of you. Protect Cherokee culture for Cherokee children and our future!” WTF? They use the “poor us” to justify acting just like any other oppressing racist mofo. WTF???

  32. *sigh* It’s times like this that I feel bad for being white…

  33. I’m so glad there is somewhere I can actually be angry without being labeled a black b!tch. I am angry, though. I’m angry at black people, us black women in particular, for really cutting our men too much slack. We haven’t required anything from them. No education, no good job, prison records, drug problems, bunch of babies, and even worse, we allow the “educated ones” to feel like their the king of the castle. They know they are the exception and use that and the fact that no black girl wanted to talk to them in school as an excuse to date out. What they won’t say, however, is how they were too busy fantasizing about the lightest girl in the class and rarely, if ever, gave the really nice black girl the time of day. When we struggle to get somewhere, but are never really considered good enough, we take love where we can find it, get dogged, usually get left with a kid, and then we are “used goods” or “that’s good for us cause you wouldn’t talk to a good brother.” I wonder how degrading your own race of women is “good.” Black men have never had our backs. Do they honestly think they could have held an uprising during slavery and the master would step aside and let them have his wife? Heck no. They would have had to kill him. If our men had done the same thing, the white man would have gotten tired of killing their “best” men and would have left us alone. The black men let the white man know early on what they valued most-their own lives.

    Now they have the nerve to dog black women out, call us ugly, golddigging, materialistic, and loud? They didn’t call us that when they didn’t have a pot to piss in, but now since they get to wear a tie to work, we are worthless? They really think that “barbie” would give their tired arses the time of day if they had no loot. I could vent more, but I don’t want to waste space.

  34. Haha…you’re funny and right on the money at the same time. It’s great. You say many of the same things I say in my blog without the queer element, but somebody has got to do these things and take being labeled the “typical black b!tch.” I saw some blog post the other day by, I assumed it was, a black male asking why are so many black blogs angry and saying anger is unhealthy. I left a comment essentially saying, “Hey, it’s just a *blog*…venting on a blog might be what’s keeping someone from going out in the world and hurting someone else, in which case it *is* healthy” and that I thought the answer was obvious why some of us are angry, particularly to other blacks, but I guess not.

  35. I just discovered your site. It looks interesting!

    How do I join?

  36. When I read the stuff about Native American vs Black and then vs. White, I’m just like – give me a break! HUMANS all have done horrible things in this world, otherwise black tribes in africa wouldn’t have sold off their enemies to white traders.

    Black women in Africa wouldn’t be dealing with female circumcision or rape or murder.

    “White” people, as labeled here, sure have their historical set of crimes, but they didn’t originate rape or slavery. Those unfortunate ideas originated around the world at different times independently.

    For those of us in the US, let’s be really happy that the racism issue (and I’m not saying sexism because rape is still a big deal here), is for the most part (and I know not completely) confined to words. In the Sudan and in Iraq, people are dying because of prejudice.

  37. Btw, I LIKE this site. I think it is a great space.

  38. You know I can relate as a black woman to your blog 1000%.

    Thank you for being a voice when some of us cannot be heard or people refuse to listen.

    I am usually a very sweet and nice person but I have this EVIL side to me that is tested every day.

    I usually do not have the attitude look but smiling but usually I am smiling because I am laughing at all the crap we have to go through as black women. Comedy is the only thing that keeps me sane.

    Thank God for Paul Mooney because he tells it like it is and I know certain people cannot stand him.

  39. I found this site today, I can’t even remember where I found it, or what I was searching for when I came across it. Alls I know, is I’ve been here since I came in this morning, and it’s after 2pm and I’m still here. Knowing good and darn well Whyt Corporate America would not approve of this… (the nerve of me right? LMAO). I am anther ABW, who’s constantly trying to defend myself telling these folks, I’m not angry. But now I’m reading this site, and other sites that are linked to this site, and I’m feeling like … perhaps they are correct. Am I an angry black woman… Why Yes , I do believe that I am, and I believe that I am ready to embrace it as well. Feels good don’t it. :)

    Be well my Sisters and Thanks!

  40. t’s bcs ‘m blck sn’t t!! B h b h

    Crbbs!!!

  41. Keep saying what you are saying. Folks need to hear it. It is a tough job, but somebody’s got to do it.

  42. Gloria Hopkins, as a black person, I am glad she is stating her truths.You are right to point out that today’s white people have not conquered or enslaved today’s descendants, but the country still harbors racism,classism,etc. and it does this in institutionally and in ways both covert and overt.Alot of oppression has been allowed to go on because folks don’t want to say anything.Also, too many people of color catch suffering because they don’t want to rock the boat. Or they suffer and become sad down the road because they don’t want to be confront the world they live in. All of these reasons give reason to why I don’t mind outspoken people.Lets reconcile cold turkey. Tell that to Leonard Peltier, Vine Deloria,Annie Mae Aquash(I could be wrong here with the last name) Mumia Abu Jamal, Jeronimo Pratt, and Bobby Hutton. Better yet, Emmet Till.If that is too in the past, Amadou Diallo, Devin Brown, Elvira Arrelano, Vincent Chin and the countless Native Americans on reservations that are the victims of police brutality and worse.I will just say that it is fine if you don’t want to say anything, but if you don’t, let other people that do,do.It is a tough job, but somebody got to do it.This goes if you are Native American, Black,Latino, and Asian.Because whatever progress minorities make, they make because some “angry loudmouth troublemaker” spoke out. For all yall peacemakers anyway,how has your reconciliation changed minorities second class status or acquired genuine respect-self or otherwise. As for your comment earlier,that point is somewhat mute because who ever said Native Americans didn’t suffer bad like black people. One more thing, there are many African Americans that are half Native American, looks can be deceiving.Your point of view is interesting, I just don’t feel it, and don’t believe that approach of reconciliation would work for everybody-most people no matter how hard they may try.I must confess that it telling to me that you are half white.

  43. P.S. Gloria Hopkins, the ABW that wrote this is not Angry Black Women the blogger, I am another abw. So if you respond to the above post, don’t respond to the blogger, but to just ABW.

  44. Blu Girl,what you say is bull.Also, calling out the misdeeds of some Africans and the trials of African women, does not leave white people off the hook for the stuff they did despite the fact that it don’t excuse some blacks for the mistreatment of other blacks. It is fully within the capacity of black people to call each other out about our misdeeds with out letting others of the hook. Also, people mistreating their own and selling their own ain’t endemic to us.If it was, it still do not justify outside aggression. There is not a place in the world where the oppressed or soon to be were not divided.In Iraq, they are raising sand with each other, but does that excuse the West. Ireland is divided into Protestant and Catholics who kill each other everyday. But does that excuse the misdeeds of the British. Not by a long shot. During the ethnic cleansing/genocide/or tribalism that was Bosnia-Herzgovina, was the war crimes of the U.S. justified even though those folks killed each other left and right. Also,speaking of rape, what is going on with this European sex slave trade. This is a clear example of mistreatment of white females by their own, but does the fact that some women are desperate or have a clue of what they are getting into justify the abuse and slavery they eventually encounter.You know as well as I do it don’t. Or better yet, does the fact that some women are madams and men are pimps connected to organized crime, excuse this atrocity that impacts largely, though not only women. This being the case, they are the targets. The kicker you state is that racism only exist in words. In what world.Pardon my French or English but are you kidding. Hate crimes happen to minorities everyday.Blacks make up the group most likely to be targeted, but the rate of Asians and Latinos is rising daily. Native Americans might be target at about the same rate as us.Look at the main targets of Police Brutality-all minorities and know that race is a huge part of this. While you consider this, let it be known that the thousands of people believed to be victims of hate crime and police brutality are the ones you were lucky enough to hear about.Also, whites had a slave trade called indentured servitude and before that feudalism in Europe so it is stupid to call black people out when whites have done the same. But bad as all that was, the descendants of those indentured slaves are not perceived the way African descendants were.

  45. ABW: thank you for your lengthy and thoughtful response.

    Your comment that you could tell I was half white is a fantastic example of the “us vs. them” mentality. Stop that, please. Once you stop that shit, things might start looking better for you.

    Gloria

  46. I’m an angry white man now. My government is keeping me from my beautiful black wife. She is being held hostage in Nigeria by the Lagos consualate. I think the white consulate has a problem with me being married to a black African. I am Angry!!

  47. Gloria Hopkins, I do not have to promote an us vs them mentality because that already exists.You do not know how things are for me because you do not know me,so it may be you that needs to stop judging. Things do not look bad for me. I just do not see things from the perspective that you do. I am entitled to my point of view the way you are. You should consider this the way you may expect me to consider your point of view.
    ABW

  48. You assume most white people are scared? I sure as hell ain’t.

  49. abw, what you say is bull!
    the vast majority of racist crimes is commited by blacks against white victims. racist murders are disproportionally black-on-white, racist rapes are entirely black-on-white. the difference is that racist crimes against whites are never treated as hate crimes – therefore your statistics aren’t worth a cold poo.

    crimes commited by black racists are ignored by the media (anyone remember the wichita massacre?) while movies only feature white “racists”. woohoo, that must be that legendary white privilege…

  50. Hmm… everyone, please feel free to join me in pointing and laughing.

  51. And thank you to Vinnie, the latest visitor from The Twilight Zone.

  52. Vinnie, what planet do you live on?

  53. Vinnie, Vinnie, VINNIE!

    Please, just continue watching Hannity & Colmes and Bill O’Reilly and leave thinking discussion to others. You are clearly not up to the task!

  54. Vinnie, what you say is bull! In the real world, things are the exact opposite of what you say !

  55. ::points, laughs like that obnoxious kid from the Simpsons::

  56. Vinnie needs a reality check

  57. Exactly Nora and Carrie!!

  58. Before I start I would like to thank my mom and dad for making it clear to me at an early age that I was going to be a white collar professional with nothing less than a Masters degree. My parents are two wonderful black people and to this day are still married and have been married for 40 years.

    However, I as a black man from the west coast, I am tired of statements from people like Monica, #33. Black men get blamed for every ill.

    Monica what kind of person are you!!! Monica, #33, you must be a lawyer or in law school. Only a lawyer or a future lawyer could write such a wonderful mix of truth, lie, and omission of facts and have all those facts come out smelling fresh and believable.

    “I’m angry at black people black women in particular, for really cutting our men too much slack…”
    I disagree, I don’t think the problem is too much slack. I think the problem is that black women are too bigoted “anti-male” towards black men, black boys in particular, and have low expectations. Unfortunately, other races are just as and sometimes even more bigoted “anti-male” towards black boys as well.

    My parents enrolled me in private schools from grades PreK-12 and for college as well. When I went to my private high school, my mom got some serious attitude and grief from some of other black mothers (not relatives) who felt black boys should only go to public schools, but it is perfectly fine to send their black girls to private schools. Even though the black community was fairly small, it was all too normal to observe black girls in private schools, while their older or younger brothers were in public schools or even questionable public schools. You could easily over hear conversation about which private school is best for a black girl, but dead silence on the same subject for black boys. Take a wild guess who consistently went and goes to college, the black girl in a private high school or the black boy in a public high school. Keep in mind we are talking about children in the same family!

    My mom kept me on a tight leash. I knew my homework had to be done by a certain time and free of mistakes. Sunday through Thursday I could not go out; it was homework only night. However, study groups were allowed. Going out on Friday or Saturday night was contingent on how much homework I had left. I still had to be home before 11pm or midnight. My parents did not allow me to hang out with unethical people or trouble makers. Since I was at a private school, PreK-8 was uniform only. High school (9-12) had a strict dress code: collared shirt, slacks (no jeans), no jewelry, and dress shoes. Tennis shoes or sneakers could only be worn during PE class. There was a special uniform for PE. Basically the school’s dress code was clothing from The GAP. I bought my first pair of jeans sophomore year of college.

    “No education, no good job, prison records, drug problems, bunch of babies, and even worse, we allow the “educated ones” to feel like their the king of the castle.”
    No education, no good job, prison records, drug problems – see the point above. Furthermore, it doesn’t matter what race, ethnicity, or country you are from women (single, married, divorce, or widowed) are responsible for instilling character, values, and raising productive children. How come a white woman can raise a black man to go double ivy (Columbia and Harvard Law) and run for President but an unusual percentage of black women can’t?
    bunch of babies – As far as I know it takes two. Why do black women never ever talk about their role in the problem? How come black women haven’t mastered the use of preventive birth control? How come black women haven’t mastered the use of the emergency day after pill, just to be absolutely sure pregnancy does not occur? How come black women don’t say no? If you have to have sex and you are not married, how come black women haven’t mastered other sexual techniques that won’t lead to pregnancy?

    “…educated ones” to feel like their the king of the castle. They know they are the exception and use that and the fact that no black girl wanted to talk to them in school as an excuse to date out.”
    Shame on you!!!! You know that is dead wrong, from my experience most black women don’t like nerds and take the position “Nerds need not apply!!” Maybe you are one of the few that liked nerds, but you are rare. My statements maybe harsh, but they are true. Asian girls know today’s nerd will be a tomorrow’s doctor, dentist, lawyer, or business executive, and aggressively go after those types. White girls tend be 50 / 50 or try to game the system and have their cake and eat it too. Unfortunately, in this day and age you have to have a college degree and that usually requires a lot of A’s and high standardized test scores. If you are not a nerd (not necessarily in looks) you probably won’t go to college. In talking to other college educated black men who weren’t athletes the experience was very similar.

    My dress today reflects my up bring. A lot black women moan groan about not having any clean cut guys, but when they see it they attack it. If I go near a large group of blacks I get grief for my clean cut look.

    In high school I had an Asian girlfriend. The black girls either wanted the bad boys from the public schools, ball players from the public schools, pretty blond surfers, or the bi-racial black guy with green eyes with nice “good” hair. Black women avoided me like the plague during high school and college. This is probably the reason I do not fall into the group – another black guy with a bunch of out of wedlock kids. Thank God!!!

    In college, my experience was very different than your view. Most black girls took a very hostile / anti-male attitude towards me. Most had comments along the line, “you shouldn’t be here, you should have a blue collar job, real guys don’t go to college, etc…

    After graduating from college and relocating to the Northeast I ran into a lot of black women who came across pissed that I had made it. Very few seemed to take the opportunity to make some kind of positive move to hook a successful black guy. Most seemed more interested in sharpening the proverbial ax and in chopping me down to size. God help you for saying good morning to a black woman you see week after week at the gym or on the jogging trail.

    Matter of fact, in college and after graduating from college I was asked the typical series of questions (education, playing ball, prison records, drug problems, bunch of babies). First, the questions were degrading at best. Second, most blacked women seemed more upset or perplexed that I didn’t have any of these issues. Third, all asked or implied I must be a fagg*t some were politically correct and used the word gay or homosexual. As you may guess my dating experience with black females on college was limited with very few second dates.

    At no time did I ever think of myself as the exception. Furthermore, I was too busy studying and taking leadership roles to make sure my application for college and later for graduate school had some weight to it. However, I did know I had no desire or ability to play sports and that was basically a death sentence. The whites and Asians picked me after the invisible guy had been picked.

    “What they won’t say, however, is how they were too busy fantasizing about the lightest girl in the class and rarely, if ever, gave the really nice black girl the time of day.”
    I would say it is true for some but not for all. Most of the non-fair black girls at my school had one thing in common, overweight. +300 pounds was very common. I am from the West Coast and obesity is not attractive. The few height / weight proportional black women were only interested in trying to get their 4.0 GPA. The fair skin girls were a little more social.

    “Black men have never had our backs.”
    How did you determine that? If American black men are so bad, take a page from the white play book, go get a black man from another part of the country or another country all together. White women seem to have the same grip about white men, and white women just go get a man from anther country.

    “get dogged, usually get left with a kid”
    No you selected the wrong type of guy. You left out you like your guys rough and tumble with a gold tooth and corn rows.

    Now they have the nerve to dog black women out, call us ugly, golddigging, materialistic, and loud?
    There are a lot of loud black women. I hope you are not trying to say other wise.
    In regards to gold-digging and materialistic, most women of any race are. Most men of any races realize this and try to eliminate the women who will break them financially, women who are out of their league, or the women who will leave once the money dries up.

    They really think that “barbie” would give their tired arses the time of day if they had no loot.
    Very few woman of any race search for poor guys, bad boys / thugs are the only exception.

  59. Great link which defines white priviledge more thouroughly:

    http://whiteprivilege.com/definition/

  60. There’s one common thread here: SOMEONE ELSE is always responsible. Well, you’re right…

    Who do you think dismantled the built in racial laws in the USA? What color were they?

    whiteprivilege.com? Good lord give me a break. Thank your lucky star your ancestors ran the border or caught a boat (or were sold onto a boat). That’s how we all got here. American indian? You walked here too – getting to the party early doesn’t make you special.

    Regardless of your color (white too), everyone’s SORRY about what happened, OK?
    Now get to work.

  61. Gee, Steve. You don’t seem very sorry. You seem more shrill and unreasonable. I guess we’re not the only ones who need to “Get over it”. Calm down, take a pill or something. You’re obviously off your meds.

  62. Because I have zero to be sorry for ABW. While your ancestors were drug over here by some very nasty people, mine were trying to keep some chow on the table while hoping the local noble didn’t toss them off his land.

    I’m 55, and was lucky to grow up in a very mixed racial area, and looking back over the years only one thing made a difference — some people got up and DID something to improve their lives and others had a million reasons why they could not. There’s no “advantage” to being white (unless you’re a noble). There’s only advantage in persistence – when you live somewhere where you can better your life – and we both do.

    People feel anger for one reason — someone (or themselves) has violated their personal set of rules for how the world and the people in it are supposed to behave. Period. No exceptions.

    Take a hard look at your personal rule set. Shed anything holding you back.

    I admit my first post was facetious, but it was to make a point – what’s stopping most people, NOW.

  63. …what’s stopping most people, NOW.

    Bullshitting old men like you.

  64. Well thanks Angel, very well thought out opinion. Spend some time in the Required Reading section here.

    I’ve been reading everything here and some of the linked sites on white priv, but unless someone can point it out, I’m not seeing something folks (white) can take action on. The section on male priv has real merits, but I work in healthcare – all the executives are mostly female and honestly, I see the same executive abuses, just less vulgarity.

  65. People feel anger for one reason — someone (or themselves) has violated their personal set of rules for how the world and the people in it are supposed to behave. Period. No exceptions.

    Steve, I’m curious. What is the thinking behind your heavy use of the Voice of Authority here? Do you find that condescension is an effective tool for convincing people? Are you trying to make a point about my inferiority to you? Do you genuinely have all the answers and just want to share? What is it?

  66. Well thanks Angel, very well thought out opinion.

    Thank you.

    Spend some time in the Required Reading section here.

    Not only have I spent some time reading the material, I know exaclt what she’s talking about because as a Black woman, I’ve had to live on the opposite end of the spectrum when it comes to white privilege and male privilege. And, as I’m typing this, I’m feeling like a broken record because I’ve had to explain this so many times to so many people just like you who just don’t get or who just don’t want to get to it. And ABW, the other posters on this site, and myself are not the only ones.

    I’ve been reading everything here and some of the linked sites on white priv, but unless someone can point it out, I’m not seeing something folks (white) can take action on.

    Do you actually want to? I question the sincerity of a man who actually believes I should be grateful for the fact that my ancestors were stolen from their homeland and forcibly dragged thousands of miles over land and sea to be sold into bondage. (Thank your lucky star your ancestors ran the border or caught a boat (or were sold onto a boat). )

  67. Dear Steve,

    First of all, Angel was totally correct in his assessment of you as a bullshitting old man. Just to say. Now, as to your specific points.

    “Because I have zero to be sorry for ABW. While your ancestors were drug over here by some very nasty people, mine were trying to keep some chow on the table while hoping the local noble didn’t toss them off his land.”

    I don’t recall anyone asking for you to be ‘sorry’ because people int he past engaged in the slave trade. i mean, it would be good if that made you sad, but if you don’t feel sad about that, I don’t actually care. It’s just more data for me and everyone else here to label you.

    And the fact that you bring up your poor, downtrodden ancestors tells me that you have no real argument other than “Oh yeah? Well, my ancestors had it BAD as well!” Whih is damned stupid.

    How does the sadness your ancestors experienced affect you today? Does it cause you to not be able to get a job? Perhaps you’ve been unfairly discriminated against because your great-great-great grandfather didn’t have a full belly every night. I’m sure someone has called you a nigger because they somehow sensed there was hardship in your family’s past.

    the material point, Steve, is that what happened to my ancestors still affects me negatively whereas what happened to your ancestors is an interesting story to tell your kids. It has not disadvantaged you in any way.

    So no, I’m not asking you to be sorry for anything. What I’m asking is that you acknowledge that, because of the color of my skin, because of the prevailing attitude of white men like you, because this is America, I have a different experience of life than you do. What I’m asking you is to take what i have to say about MY life and MY experiences and the lives and experiences of the people like me at face value instead of fucking arguing with me every step of the way about every point I, or other folks in the know, bring up.

    To put it succinctly: you’re a white man. You don’t know what it’s like to be a black woman. You don’t know what it means to be a minority of any kind. So shut the fuck up and listen or go away.

    This is your first warning.

  68. Tom: After re-reading my post I can see where you would make the “Voice of Authority” and “condescension” comments. My apologies for not writing more clearly — my only defense is that I’m not a professional writer and it can be difficult to get the right nuance in print. On the “inferiority to you”, just the exact opposite — and to answer you question “What is it?”:
    The point was to emphasize that, if you’re posting from the USA, you don’t need anyone’s permission to do what you want with your life and that, regardless of color or sex, you aren’t inferior to Anyone. I believe that life is now, which does include the reality of bigots, culture, historical context, etc but – some of that’s out of your control, but no one controls YOU, unless you allow them to. That includes letting people “make” you angry, or destroy your feelings of worthiness. Easy to say I know, harder to do.

    And yes Angel H., it really, really, doesn’t matter how you got here, you’re here today. One of the few places you can physically live and change your life. That you actually live in the USA means, on that point, you’re as lucky as I am.

    The comment on where anger comes from will be familiar to any of you or your friends who’ve taken a Psychology degree (or studied Gandhi & MLK’s lives). It was offered earlier as a statement, because hopefully the reader will then ask themselves, is that true?
    Until you’ve dealt with anger, there’s zero hope of progress in any other area. It just blinds people. If you read the other posts directed at me dispassionately, you’ll see just how quickly just letting my age be known produced immediate stereotypical replies.
    Just switch the colors and ages of the various posters and you’ll see why these race, gender (and now age) issues are such tough problems to solve in real life. In fact, I highly recommend you watch the movie “Gandhi” several times some weekend.

    I believe the anger genesis theory is true and more importantly, works as a starting point. For any of us who’s run into a bigot or is locked into any paradigm that doesn’t serve, (or just wants to be the one who thinks before speaking) we can then get to the root of the emotional issues with anger and reframe how to react and what to do so we can improve our life.
    Is that important? I presume so as there’s a lot of effort here figuring out what the heck’s wrong with white people and men, which I also assume ABW and all would like to see fixed. I could be wrong about that, trying to “fix everything” rather than discuss it is a pretty “male” trait.

    Anger makes you believe stuff that’s obviously not true to everyone else.
    Males cannot understand females. Whites can’t understand blacks. “You have no idea…” If that’s true, then there’s no hope. It’s not of course but it works if you have an anger position to support. We can go off into an anecdotal example debate, but that doesn’t serve anyone. It’s enough to know that there are people who “don’t get it” and plenty that do. That just defines the workload.

    and for Angel, I grew up in Hawaii, one of the white kids comprising 8% of the total population where I lived — a population that really does have a problem with white people and raised their kids accordingly. Maybe 1960-70 was a time that means nothing to you, but it was a time when an Asian girl could count on a beating for walking home from school with a “white boy” and you could count on meeting her male relatives within 48 hours. There the word is “haole” and it’s every bit as offensive as “nigger”. I know EXACTLY what it means to be a minority, not just a black female one, although it’s interesting you didn’t ask about my multi-racial upbringing, you just jumped to your stereotype conclusion. I also have the perspective on white priv as I lived on both sides – I can add the “that’s true” to the theory. So I read the blog with an open mind and was also looking for similar experiences, which I saw. I’m also keenly aware now that you don’t have several decades of age perspective.

    The material point, also for ABW, is that you don’t automatically discount ANY person’s life because they’re white, a male or over the age of 25. You sure as hell don’t automatically make assumptions based on that and you give every indication that you do. “I have a different experience of life than you do. What I’m asking you is to take what I have to say about MY life and MY experiences and the lives and experiences of the people like me at face value instead of fucking arguing with me every step of the way about every point I, or other folks in the know, bring up.” I didn’t argue your experience, I did ask what you plan to DO about it.

    Your diagnoses is great for what many women and blacks face in a predominately white Anglo-Saxon culture, but the knee-jerk generalizations to ALL whites and ALL males is absurd. Yeah, I know you run into it a lot, a lot of people live here. That your solution demands everyone to agree 100% with you or “shut the fuck up and listen or go away” really means you only want to lecture and see liked minded posts. That’s fine, it’s your blog even if it is public.

    Not a problem, read what you have and I won’t visit or post here again — I’m blunt but didn’t mean to offend, really. I will say that I’ve met many people who’ve suffered outrageously from bigots, but not one, myself included, that can truly claim their lot in life was because of “them”.

  69. Don’t have time at the moment to respond to all of this. But Steve, I don’t expect everyone to agree with me 100% of the time. However, I do expect people to listen and take in what i have to say before jumping in and telling me all the ways in which I am wrong. Shut the fuck up and listen is my mantra when dealing with most white people because most of the time they don’t.

  70. ABW: I think your spam blocker ate my last comment.

  71. Right on, sista, set em straight!!

  72. Your blog is inspiration to me ABW. I love it! Please do not stop blogging ever! I wish you had a forum, because I would gladly join. Ignore these trolls, and those who always want to use the “me too” argument when it comes to black issues. I enjoy reading from you. Peace sista and keep up the good work!

  73. Holy shit, these trolls do NOT represent the majority of whites. It’s the same with feminist bloggers who can’t write a single entry about their rape without getting the threatening attacks from misogynists about them being worthless cunts who will get raped again. You wouldn’t know it by the comments section of any website that requires a functional brain to participate in, but these posts are not an accurate, nor random, population sample. The people who get drawn to sites like these are either the lovers are the haters, so it’s completely skewed. So don’t lose your faith in all whites because of these overrepresented scumbag retardos.

    As for the black man who blames black women for everything that’s going wrong in the black community and with his personal inadequacies (Tod)…

    I know not to listen to your bullshit when you get to the part where you say:

    “In regards to gold-digging and materialistic, most women of any race are.”

    Don’t pretend to not understand white supremacists or how racism happens–you know perfectly well, you sexist, ignorant (a tale of private education doesn’t make up for the obvious), laughable hypocrite. Could it possibly be that black women don’t like you because you’re that rare, luscious combination of being both unattractive AND a dim-witted misogynist?! There’s food for thought! Guess I don’t feel too badly about my public education, after all…

  74. *or! OR the haters! It’s very important to proof-read before posting accusations of stupidity!

  75. Blue Girl #37:

    “For those of us in the US, let’s be really happy that the racism issue (and I’m not saying sexism because rape is still a big deal here), is for the most part (and I know not completely) confined to words. In the Sudan and in Iraq, people are dying because of prejudice.”

    Are you being serious? Why don’t you look at who were the first victims of deadly hate crimes following 9/11 in the US. Who were they? South Asians because they were mistaken for being Arab. And the more important question is why any group would be targeted and attacked simply for their ethnicity. You think racism is confined to words only in America? Please go talk to all the Arab American and South Asian Americans who lived in fear and had good reasons for feeling that way. Many of them lost loved ones due to the “linguistic” racism that exists in America. It’s a joke that you would say that racism exists only in words. What’s true is that racism is institutionalized and exerts itself violently when there is an excuse to do it.

    ABW, thanks for this website. I am struck over and over again when I hear people say that racism doesn’t exist in America. This usually comes from white people, who because they are not at the end of racism, think that racism is an issue that ironically, we non white folks have perpetuated. Even one of my roommates who’s generally nice will make stupid comments like, “well, Mexicans have a way of being violent when dealing with things.” Then he’ll launch into eloquent discussions on middle class privileges and racism against blacks. I could give lots of stories of getting into fights in high school (which is not that long ago) because some white girl called me a “ni*&@er” (I’m South Asian American but can be quite dark when I’ve been out in the sun). I’m a bit older now, but it still pisses me off that I had to go through all of that nonsense- violence, being approached and told that I’m “fucking sick” and I need to “go back” and then tailgate my car and follow me home. And it pisses me off even more when I hear people dismissively say that I should “get over it.” Live in my shoes first and then tell me to get over it.

  76. Oh, and Blue Girl– also, check out the demographics of those who are imprisoned in Guantanamo Bay. Are they white? And no, if you respond that they are there because they are “terrorists,” that is dubious at best. You can’t incriminate someone without habeaus corpus, and courts which are NOT the same as military tribunals which have their own rules and structure. None of these people have been tried, none of them even have any formal accusations against them. Those detainees are languishing in there with no future, no hope, which is why most have attempted suicide. They are subject to torture and have been tortured.

    Do read the reports that human rights organizations, civil liberties groups, and journalists have written.

  77. I’m glad that you are blogging about this topic. I am not seeing on the Internet the trailer for the Diary of a Tired Black Man…a black man tired of angry black women. I’ve been called vicious by many men (and other women) for speaking up and taking a stand on issues. I stopped being nice to them and all of sudden I’m an angry black woman. Then one day I was studying different cultural traditions and came across versions of the angry black woman in the mythologies of the Goddess. Goddesses such as Kali (the ultimate angry black woman), Pele (with her volcanic temper), Medusa (turning people to stone), or Artemis (kill a man ogling her)and I realized that anger is the key to personal transformation. Men want women to stay in their place (similiar to how black people in the Jim Crow south were expected to act like a shuffling step-in, fetch it). All women have a genuine right to be angry and that is to stop people from denigrating and subordinating us.

  78. Yeah, um, while all of you are laughing and pointing, remember that three more fingers are pointing right back at you.

    The fact that you immediately ridicule Steve and anyone who doesn’t agree with you, or isn’t black, proves that you have no interest in having a dialog, just a monologue. If it weren’t for the fact that you apparently need a bunch of sycophants to make you feel superior, you should just turn off the comments. Because you sure as hell are not interested in listening to a different viewpoint.

  79. Corby would have a point if anything he said was actually true. ah well, can’t win ‘em all.

  80. “Hmm… everyone, please feel free to join me in pointing and laughing.”

    “say it loud… you’re funny! hahahahahahahahahahaha *continues to point and laugh for a while*”

    “Angry Black Women have the advantage in almost all conflict situations.”

    “Do your thing. It’s a beautiful thing, after all.”

    “you’re a white man. You don’t know what it’s like to be a black woman. You don’t know what it means to be a minority of any kind. So shut the fuck up and listen or go away.”

    “Right on, sista, set em straight!!”

    “Shut the fuck up and listen is my mantra when dealing with most white people because most of the time they don’t.”

    “Bullshitting old men like you.”

    “Yeah, I’m another angry black woman.”

    There is plenty more, that’s just from this page. If this isn’t sycophantic rambling and dogmatic posturing, I don’t know what is.

    Look, I admire that you have the guts to say what you feel needs to be said. You are obviously intelligent and you write very well. (While you probably think I mean “You are very well spoken” like some ignorant redneck, I am saying this in relation to most other independent blogs and even some journalists, of any color, etc.)

    I liken your crusade to the Flag Burners. I have no issue with burning a flag, it’s a piece of cloth, which only has the meaning you imbue it with. When it’s gone, you can go get another one at Wal-Mart that was probably made in China or some impoverished “third-world” country. But no one is going to listen to the flag burners message, because they are so focussed on their methods.

    The same could be said about you. While you will have those who listen, and obviously have a rabid following, those who could most benefit from your message will be turned off by your method.

    But you aren’t going to change anything because of some message left on your blog, I know that. I just think you should be aware, if you are not already, that all you are doing is preaching to the choir, when there’s a whole bunch of people in the church waiting to be informed by someone like yourself who could do so much more.

  81. Shorter Corby:

    “Give it up, negrah! Ain’t nobogy listenin’ to yoooo!”

  82. bwahahahaha Angel! Oh wait, I’m not supposed to laugh anymore. i am a very serious Angry Black Woman. Ahem.

    Corby, I’m going to assume for a moment that you’re a rational, adult person who lives in the world and has interactions with multiple and varied people most days in your life. I know I’m assuming a lot, but I’ll be generous for now. Anyway, you know as well as I do that there’s hardly a point in engaging certain people in rational, adult conversations because they cannot see past their own noses/issues/beliefs, whatever.

    One good example is a certain kind of Christian Fundamentalist who will not listen to what anyone but their parents and/or their pastor says. If the church tells them that dinosaurs and cavemen existed together in the garden of Eden, then they did! If the Bible says that God hates Fags (even if it doesn’t), then he must! Even if you talked to this person for hours and days and years, they probably wouldn’t change their mindset because you are a crazy outsider, or the Devil, or whatever. They’re trained NOT to listen to you. You might feel sad about them, you might still try, but it’s going to take more than you just telling them what’s what for them to realize.

    Now, take that same scenario and transfer it to most white people in America. Except it isn’t just the Pastor or their parents telling them foolishness, it’s the ENTIRE CULTURE. How in the world will you get past such pervasive programming? Sometimes you can’t, sometimes you can. But thinking back on your life, I’ll just bet that there are plenty of people who you’ve felt held a ridiculous opinion and, seeing that they can’t be persuaded out of it, you either feel bad about them or you laugh at them either to their face or behind their backs. heck, it’s almost an American pastime to laugh our asses off at Pat Robertson and the people who believe him. The Creation Museum elicited more titters than a rare Jay Leno monologue that is actually funny.

    In the face of rampant racism, ignorance, and bad manners, I have two choices. I can tirelessly work to educate the masses patiently, or I can laugh at utter assholes who come to MY space on the web and insult me then presume to tell me how to be. How dare you point and laugh! they scream. All the while passing judgment as if they know what it’s like to be constantly under attack not just because of my views, but because my header proclaims that I am both black and a woman and therefore a target.

    yet through all that I still find a way to have a decent conversation with most people. there have been plenty of times on this blog when someone has come in, honestly seeking to understand, or even disagreeing but doing so respectfully, and I have dialogued with them. Hell, even some people who *don’t* come here respectfully get better treatment than they give because, for whatever reason, I feel they are educatable. So your assertion that this blog is only for sycophants and that we shout down everyone who disagrees is both ignorant and laughable. It shows that you’ve not been reading this blog for very long and you haven’t read nearly a quarter of the posts and comments. You, like most of the people who comment here and not on one of the posts, had already made up your mind about me the minute you saw the name of this blog.

    So, yes, I point and laugh. because a lot of you idiots are laughable. The only other choice I have is to cry. And I do enough of that over important things in my life and not random jerkwads on the internet. You want someone to come hold your hand through this? then you go find a website called “The Happy Black Woman” and ask her to do so. You want me to be politer to some of these people? You teach them some manners and, while you’re at it, give them some diversity training. You want me to change how I relate to folks on my blog? Then you go out and change the world. Until then, I have no time for you.

  83. Ts s rdcls! m yr sld, WHT nd cnt blv wht m rdng! wh vr md ths wdst s fckng rtrdd! NGR BLCK WMN??? r y rcst? r m mss jdgng smthng? wh cnt t b ngr wmn? wh ngr BLCK wmn? y fckng dt. swr t gd f fnd t wh y wr d lk t smck y crss trh fc, nd spt n yr fc. Y BGT!

  84. all right, that’s it, I’m closing the comment thread here. I can’t take the stupid. Raquel, you’re banned for using the word ‘retarded’ as a pejorative. And also for being 13 and not knowing how to spell. And for generally being an ass.

    Anyway, if anyone wishes to engage me in discussion, do so on an active thread. But, for God’s sake, stay on topic.

    ETA: Hmm, seems that, unlike regular posts, I cannot turn off comments on a “Page” without all of the comments disappearing. Therefore, I shall leave the comments on and deal with the stupid. *long suffering sigh*

    Son of ETA: And what is it with Canadian teenagers? That’s the third one recently who has come here spouting crazy. Am I liked on some Canadian MySpace or something?

  85. In short, Corby, you are wasting your time. ABW is right and everyone else is full of crap.

  86. I am bookmarking your blog, love. <3 It does my soul good to read it. Keep doing what you are doing!

  87. Angel H:

    You are obviously a student of logic, and have followed my comments very well. In fact, my complimenting of ABW’s ability to write and form cogent arguments must mean I am a racist and beat on minorities for fun. Also, my metaphor about the church and choir indicates my hatred for ABW specifically and my desire to have her shut up, even though I pointed out that many people would love to hear what she has to say.

    Well done.

    As for ABW and your assessment of me. Your title gives a strong indication of your theme here, and this page in particular enforces that. I was hoping it would be ironic, but it was not. I live in the real world, whatever that means, and I have friends and associates of all races and classes and genders and sexualities and whatnot. I think it’s great, because they know things I do not, and educate me constantly on their lives and what it’s like to be them. And I do the same.

    Those people you mention who have ridiculous opinions – I don’t walk away, and I don’t laugh. I engage, and if they walk away, then so be it. Sometimes, we agree to disagree and move on. But I never ridicule them. That makes them defensive and digs them into their opinion more, and makes them more reticent to change.

    But you already know that. And that’s my point. You, and those like you (angry people, not [insert race here] people), prefer that, because it confirms that you are right and they are wrong, since you are willing to dialog and they apparently aren’t. You use confrontational language and then blame them for not listening. It justifies your own behavior to you, and allows you to point the finger of judgment at anyone who disagrees.

    You even characterize me as one of “you idiots” just because I disagree with you. Instead of trying to, initially, prove me wrong, you just make offhand rhetorical comments to dismiss me. Am I not educatable? Did you not draw conclusions based upon my comment?

    I have looked through your blog here, and I have seen you write interesting articles, even though I think you are seeing racism in many places it does not exist. Should I point and laugh at you because of what I find to be a ridiculous and programmed opinion? Of course not, if for no other reason than it’s incredibly rude, and further, this is your house, and I’d do well not to pee in the corners.

    I really don’t think you are a target; I think you THINK you are a target, and do everything in your power to be one. That also plays into the aggressive stance you’ve taken here. Most white people I know are not racist, and would be very offended to be called so. I do know some, and I tend not to associate with them on a regular basis. And when I do, I make it a point to tell them how horrible their racism is, and one of them is my mother.

    But, as another poster said, I am wrong and you are right, regardless of what I say. I still feel that you have a forum that could be used to honestly educate instead of divide. The fact that someone jumped down my throat with such an ignorant comment (Angel H) clearly indicates the environment you’ve cultivated here. If that’s what you prefer, then you’ve done well for yourself, and should be very proud with your cult of personality.

  88. Corby:

    You even characterize me as one of “you idiots” just because I disagree with you. Instead of trying to, initially, prove me wrong, you just make offhand rhetorical comments to dismiss me. Am I not educatable? Did you not draw conclusions based upon my comment?

    Hon, exactly how much time do you think I should spend on every fool who comes here? I do have a life and other interests outside of this blog. I don’t have the patience to give a deep, psychological assessment of all those whom come here. All I have to go on is the comments they make. And your comment did not give me any indication that you were educatable or worth my time. Your further commentary hasn’t done anything to dissuade that first impression. Especially as you keep repeating the ridiculousness that is “you dismiss me because I disagree!” No, I dismiss you because you disagree unintelligently. At least, that’s how you come off.

    I think you are seeing racism in many places it does not exist.

    well, that’s a lovely opinion to have and it’s your right to have it. I’m going to put forth that, because you’re white, you don’t get to be the arbiter of what is or isn’t racist because, hey, it’s not about you.

    I really don’t think you are a target; I think you THINK you are a target

    And again we come up against an opinion that you hold mainly because you’re white. If you don’t understand how being both black and a woman makes me a target, then you need to go school yourself. It’s not on white men like YOU to determine these things. It explains a lot about you, though.

    Here’s a thing you need to grasp: because you are white and male and have the privilege of such, you are going to have to turn half of your brain inside out to even begin to understand the position I’m coming from You are going to need to feel REALLY uncomfortable for a time because the realization will hit that, yes, because you’re white, your opinion on race from a minority perspective isn’t worth the paper it’s printed on. And yet, you still need to learn more to become a useful part of the discussion on race. You’ll still need to engage, even though you can’t be in control, you can’t make the conversation all about you, and you can’t be The Decider about whether something is racist or someone else is or is not a target because of who they are.

    The environment I’ve cultivated here is one of people speaking their minds freely and not taking shit from the first paternal asshole who wanders by and smacks us on the nose with a newspaper. We’re tired of the shit you and yours offer us and we don’t take it. If you have the balls to stick around and try to learn, that would be just great. But until you figure out how to talk to us without coming off like a crazy fundamentalist (not for jesus, but for whiteness!), we’re not going to cut you any slack.

  89. Is your assertion that black men don’t like black women in general, or that we don’t like angry black women?

    In either case, what are your thoughts as to why black men don’t like black women and have they changed as you’ve grown older?

    Looking forward to your response. My compliments on your blog.

    H

  90. ABW – I have a blog crush on you. Just thought I’d say so.

  91. Before I get started, I would like to say that I am not the angry black woman writer/blogger, I am another poster. But I would like to say to Corby that six people may very well be pointing their finger at the three pointing at the others laughing. I am not saying that Steve is not entitled to his point of view but we are entitled to disagree. Who’s to say people not in agreement with the AngryBlackWomen or people that agree with her above bias themselves. We are not syncophants for agree with her because we feel the same way, we just do not see things the way Steve and his supporters do.

    Corby:The same could be said about you. While you will love those who listen, and obviously have a rabid following, those who could mot benefit from your message will be turned off by your method.

    It may behoove the angryblackwoman to consider this up to a point, but Steve himself was dripping with sarcasm and condescension . So why not give this advice to him as well.But you don’t see that and maybe he is entitled to act this way because he’s white. The fact that you called out this blogger and the posters that agree with her syncophants says alot about your objectivity/reason/well-meaning advice and what not. What a way to win us to your take! You defend Mr. slightly inconvenienced white male Steve for being offended but what about minorities that go on white websites/posts/blogs and get offended by whites all the time whether they partially agree with their stance or not. Whether they use tact or not. Few people of your disposition come to their rescue.This scenario is at least as numerous as the other way around. Minorities are told all the time to get over it, lightened up, and toughen up. We are inconvenienced all the time so If we aren’t special why must we bend over backwards to accomodate them. And when it is all said and done, her articles have some truth whether you like her, her personality, or tack or lack thereof. She is not here to win a popularity contest no more than some of the posters that bad mouth her. People will still agree or disagree with her whether he supports her or not. Who’s to say her anger did not evolve from encountering the same attitude over and over with people that disagreed with her displayed despite her possible tack, cool personality, and admiration at times.

  92. Steve, it is bad that your minority girlfriend was ostracized for dating a white guy. Or that you were called haole. But you know as well as I do that your minority girlfriend was met with apprehension from other white people, if not your family. We also know white people have colorful names for Asians and Indigenous Hawaiians. As offensive as your experiences were, they stopped there. You were not denied economic opportunities, etc… and encountered obstacles at the level your minority counterparts were in addition to having to put up with discomfort. This may not be the case for your Asian companion. Also, your experiences in life are different from the average person minority and woman so there is reason to see things differently. People of colors ancestors had to deal with all this stuff in addition to poverty. They had to deal with oppression based on race,colonial/internal colonialism, nationality, and putting chow on the table-and not getting much out of life despite hard work,tenacity, initiative, and pluck. They had few opportunities and no luck. To be honest, it is still like that for their descendants to some extent today. You pay short shrift to our lives but if you refuse to feel where we are coming from and get mad when we throw hostility at you back-cry us a river, a stream, an ocean, and a dam.

  93. Also, successful minorities and unsuccessful minorities suffer in ways whites rich and poor do not have to, whether in the West or the Global South.

  94. The group most discriminated against by far has to be ugly people. Halle Berry had more advantages in life being born “pretty” than an “ugly” white boy from her same neighborhood. This discrimination cuts across racial, gender and sexual lines, which makes it arguably the most prevalent injustice of all. Yet, one never hears so much as a peep in regards to this ubiquitous prejudice. No speaches from the podium. No blogs. Nothing. So tell me, why aren’t those of us similarly oppressed by the images of beauty more vocal and more angry? I say, Fuck Halle Berry and the other symbols of anyone who’s ever gotten anything more in life because of a physical attribute. I offer that this is the great inequality of all time and the one you should be focusing your attention (and anger) toward.

  95. BW sd: “wll, thts lvl pnn t hv nd ts yr rght t hv t. m gng t pt frth tht, bcs yr wht, y dnt gt t b th rbtr f wht s r snt rcst bcs, h, ts nt bt y.” hv rspns: wll, thts lvl pnn t hv nd ts yr rght t hv t. m gng t pt frth tht, bcs yr blck, y dnt gt t b th rbtr f wht s r snt rcst bcs, h, ts nt bt y. Thr. Tw cn pl t tht gm. Y ls sd: “bcs yr wht, yr pnn n rc frm mnrt prspctv snt wrth th ppr ts prntd n.” Wll, tht’s jst grt. f wht ppl r ncpbl f ndrstndng yr pstn, thn t’s nt rtnl tht th vn tr. Hw’s ths? Bcs yr blck, yr pnn n lw nd dmcrc frm hstrcl prspctv snt wrth th ppr ts prntd n. Nnsnscl, sn’t t? bt s nnsnscl s th rbbsh tht y’r spwng. BW, y’r nthng bt n bnxs, bgtd, flt-t rcst f th dvsv knd. Th nl dffrnc btwn ‘crckr’ nd y s tht y’r blck nd hv prsctn cmplx, nd th crckr s wht nd hs n nfrrt cmplx.

  96. h n! Y’v tkn ll m vwls! Hv fn bng ngr, msrbl, nd cnfrnttnl. t’ll grnt tht y nd ths lk y st t f n pstn f nflnc frvr.

  97. I find it quite sad that someone is trying to glorify something so negative.

    What does an “angry black woman” gain by being angry? Little more than the contempt of those around her who are better endowed with both manners and social awareness.

    Stop being proud of perpetuating a negative stereotype. Did you ever think for a second, that if you took the chip of your shoulder, people might start to treat you normally?

  98. “Did you ever think for a second, that if you took the chip of your shoulder, people might start to treat you normally?”

    See Ken, you’ve got it backwards. It’s when society *doesn’t* treat a person “normally” that s/he gets a chip on her shoulder. From your comment it sounds as if you enjoy the privilege of “normal” treatment, so of course anger seems illogical to you. But if you were the frequent recipient of negative, belittling, or unfair treatment, you might be angry too.

    Why don’t you read up on the sections on “white privilege” and “male privilege”? That might expand your social awareness enough to explain some of the anger.

  99. It’s sad to see so much evidence of our society’s institutionalized racism — even here in the comments section of a blog. It is so easy to subjugate and marginalize a people for a few centuries and then step back and say “OK, everything is cool, now and the answer is for you to get over it and solve all of your own problems.”

    1. Everything is not cool: Racism is still rampant. It’s just not as acceptable to be obvious. (Although even that is changing, over the past 7 years.)

    2. Everything is not cool: Misogyny is pervasive in our society and most women who try to “solve their own problems” are labeled femi-nazi lesbian bitches and aggressively suppressed and marginalized.

    3. Telling people “it is all up to them” tends to dismiss/ deny the very real obstacles and suppressions that still exist, even today.

    4. After centuries of suppression, even the most grounded person may have trouble with the “forgive and forget” advice — especially if institutional problems *still* exist, and have been compounded by having lived generations with the aggregating results of those institutional problems.

    Reminds me of that book Adam Shepard wrote (and that someone actually published) which seeks to diminish the plight of the homeless by viewing it through the perspective of a privileged white boy who thinks that because he “roughed it,” for a few weeks that everyone else can apply the same approach to a lifetime (and, at the same time, imply that the causes of the problem are from the victims, themselves).

    Arrogance and hubris abound as too many continue to see life through the prism of their own eyes, while lacking any degree of empathy for those who were never allowed in the privileged halls of patriarchy or racial privilege.

    If I hear one more person assert that “whites and/or males are the ones really being discriminated against,” merely because their historic privilege is threatened, I think I’ll be physically ill.

    Personally, I am surprised every black woman is not an ABW. Or maybe they are, to one degree or another, but just haven’t been vocal.

  100. Just read Angry Black Woman’s advice to Corby.

    Spot on, ABW!

  101. The reason I looked into this website is that I’m seeking understanding into what I have encountered as “angry black females.” I have lived in downtown Atlanta for 4 years and moved here because I wanted to live in a diverse community. Unfortunately, I have had several encounters with black women that have challenged me, and while I do not want to appear racist, I am at my wits end as to how to deal with these women. If they were white, Asian, or a member of any other group, I would be saying the same. I am looking for your help.

    I have had several experiences where black women are acting in an inappropriate or rude way and I ask them to stop it and then they get a very hostile, combative attitude. What is making me write you is that last Sunday I was in church and there were two black women behind me that felt it was OK to talk through the entire service. When I turned around to them and asked them to please stop talking, one of the women looked at me, started to shake her head, and said, “Don’t go there.” I then turned back around and they resumed their conversation.

    I live in downtown Atlanta and moved here four years ago because I like diverse neighborhoods and have a number of black, white, hispanic, gay, etc., friends. I am just at a loss as to how to deal with these women – I have no problem and support a black woman’s right to be angry, but I on the other hand will not tolerate an “angry black woman” behaving inappropriately and then attacking me for calling her on it.

  102. [sigh...]

    SWF: You say that you “do not want to appear racist”, but you’re not doing a very good job of it.

    #1, You come this blog written by an “Angry Black Woman” in order to find insight on other “angry Black women” you have encountered. Ever heard the expression “they all look alike”? Well apparently, we all think alike, talk alike, etc. [/sarcasm]

    #2, You specifically point out the behaviors of the Black women you’ve encountered. I find it extremely hard to believe that the only people who have ever been rude to you are Black women. Why did you feel the need to set them apart? Have you gone to other blogs and asked for help on dealing with Black men, Asian men and women, Hispanic men and women, and White men? Why not?

    Lastly – and I cannot stress this enough – it’s not all about you. I would wager that none of those women could give a damn about how they’re perceived by some “single White female” that they don’t know from Eve. They’ve got their own problems, their own outlooks, their joys and their sorrows. They couldn’t give a damn about you. And that’s their prerogative. Yeah, it sucks when people are rude. But you get over it and move on. Big freakin’ deal.

  103. Ths st s grt – t s s hnst. Ths sht s s fnn. s wht prsn wh s nt th lst bt ntmdtd b BWs (r BMs fr tht mttr) th jst mk m lgh. Th mst nnyng prt bt BWs s tht th s th sm phrs vr nd vr nd vr nd vr. Th bst w t stnd p t thm nd gt rght n thr fc tl yr spt hts m. Th bst w t sht thm p s t smck th blck rght ff thr fc. Tht sll wrks r t lst stns thm fr mnt, bt smtms th strt bck p gn wth nthr phrs. Th rmnd f m f mn lm th w th jst rpt th sm phrs. nd t snt wmn bs f th wgh mr thn y d. Mst BWs r bs s th sll qlf. hv tw frnds tht ctch shplftrs (% BWs). Th hv sm rll fnn strs. Th lv t cll s crckrs nd thnk tht s m fvrt prt f BWs. hv dtd BWs (nt th ft ns, jst th thck ns) – rll th r sft n th nsd. Jst bg sfts. f th jst lst wght nd tk cr f thmslvs th wldnt b s md nd gys wld p ttntn t thm lttl. Th jst nd t b lvd, thn td, n mr BWs. Tht s wh slm blck chcks r lwys swt t wht gys lk m. Th ft ns knw th hv n chnc nd s th gt md vr tm t bcm BWs. Blck gys mstrt m s smtms th g fr wht gys bt w dnt wnt m thr s thn th hv n mn = mr ngr. BWs r vr ntrtnng nd th ht thr kds t th grcr str. Tht sht s s fnn. Bt mstl th nd t b lvd, bt th r ft nd smll s tht s t th wndw. t mks m lgh whn ppl r scrd f thm thgh, wht ppl r sch psss smtms. BWs knw whn th cn gt w wth th rnts nd whn th cnt. Th r blffrs, y jst pll thr crd nd th fll rght n ln. Grt st! Kp p th gd wrk!

  104. ^^^Racist, sexist, *and* a complete asshole…

    How much you wanna bet that he’s single?

  105. nh, hv lv n grlfrnd. Hw m rcst? Jst tlln t hw t s. Jst lk ths st ds frm BWs prspctv. lk th st, fr spch tc. vrybd nds t lsn p bt nd jst tk thngs fr hw th r. Wht ppl r gf nd w cnt jmp r dnc, BWs r mstl ft, th sk s bl, whtvr. Nt tryng t b hrtfl t nyn, jst syng m pnn. Snc m wht m nt llwd t s t hw t s, gss. Mst b n th BW hndbk. nyw, nt tryng t b n sshl jst shrng m prspctv. ts n pn frm nd h wh nt spc t p sm.

  106. I’m sorry. What on earth gave you the idea this was an open forum?

  107. I’ll de-vowel you Nielsen Hayden style and laugh while I do it.

    I liked the honesty of the site but you don’t like my honesty I guess.

  108. Yeah…. here’s the thing. Anyone who comes to this blog and uses the phrase “smack the black off of you” really doesn’t deserve to be respected and treated well. Or even listened to.

    I’m consistently amazed how people confuse “unable to hear dissent” with “refuses to put up with abuse”.

  109. Ok, I admit that maybe that was a poor choice of words and you have the right to sensor how you see fit; but the rest of it was dead on whether people want to admit or not. I couldn’t care less if people think it is racist because it is true. I just think that people don’t want to hear it. Sure there are exceptions to the rule etc. If you watch comic view on BET there are tons of generalizations about white people and they are really funny. Am I supposed to be offended because they accurately generalize white people’s inability to dance? No cuz it is true ( I mean we do have Justin Timberlake, but still, it is true)

    Anyway I really do like your site for its truthfulness. The funniest part is when white people write about how they are scared of black people (why? they are mostly nice folks) and can’t understand why they are so mad. Black people have sorta been shit on for a long time. i grew up in a mixed neighborhood in the south so racial tension was always there. I got jumped and robbed by groups of black guys, so you just beat the shit out of one of em in front of their friends and their friends pick on em about how they got beat up by a “cracka”. then you get left alone. Big deal. You have to just laugh at it sometimes or you will just start hating each other. Black women are often loud and mad, white people are stiff, asians are usually short. Big deal, I have to chuckle when people take this stuff so seriously.

    Anyway, you can delete this too but I just thought I’d put it out there.

    I’ll leave it alone now. Keep up the good work on the site.

  110. Lol = Michael?

  111. No, My name is Matt, and the answer to your question was devoweled. I have a live in girlfriend, so i’m not single. I just stumbled across the website and thought it was bold and honest. i can respect that. Just threw in my 2 cents but it wasn’t well received.

  112. Nothing wrong with being bold and honest, just don’t expect everyone to be hand over a cookie or fall over you after showing what sort of person you are.

  113. Lol: It’s funny how you think I give a damn.

  114. OMG….i just read TOD’s post and I thought I was going to fall out of my chair! I find the majority of all the things your saying to be LIES! YOU must be a politician because your saying one thing, but your actions (as stated in your post) reflect another! In highschool I had an asian women…blk girls wanted blk jocks etc….why were you going after THOSE black girls ..your saying not ONE black girl was intersted in you…EVEN IN COLLEGE! SMH! …And … are you attractive, that has a lot to do with it…cause if your ugly….then I understand …..I would have avoided you like……..JUST KIDDING TOD,
    maybe its something your doing giving off…SOME and I stress SOME blk men feel once theyve become succesful to FULLY accent there success they need a anti black women…. and you come off kind of JERKish…im only telling you this because I felt that way , and Im not any of those women you described, Im still coming into my own but I always had class and prestige……DID YOU HAVE BLACK GIRL-FRIENDS…DO YOU HAVE BLACK GUY FRIENDS…

    .I will pick out each one and get back to ASAP for now I have finals to study for but you will be addressed! ( you are so brainwashed!) …

    questions for now:
    WHAT TYPE OF BLACK PEOPLE ARE YOU SURROUNDING YOURSELF WITH?

    WHAT BLACK WOMEN WERE ASHAMED YOU MADE IT and PLEASE TELL ME THE CITIES because I need to GO AND check this out myself?

    I THOUGHT PEOPLE WERE A PRODUCT OF THEIR ENVIROMENT?
    -just because YOU were taught properly about safe sex does not mean all schools teach about it…

    birthcontrol is expensive ( i wouldnt kno but I assume it is) girls who grow up in fatherless homes typically look for love in other places girls give sex to get love guys give love to get sex AND….a lot of these girls who are getting pregnant didnt and still don’t have the role models you did AND! and a guy could convince a girl to go raw especially if she thinks he loves her…DUH! im 19 and I know this..TOD STEP YOUR GAME UP HUN

    -my friend went to an inner city school and they taught her the underground railroad was a REAALLLL RAILROAD!! so what type of education system are you comparing it to …you can’t compare it to your PRIVITE SCHOOLS OBVIOUSLY there different

    NOT ALL BLACK WOMEN WANT A BAD BOY…I a future business women and my sister and our sucessful entourage are filled with Masters, Current Law School/Medical School and current gradschool and PHD candidate…women at that… and we…especially them OLDER WOMEN early to late 20s, DO NOT want bad boys…and were all pretty LIKE REALLY PRETTY so what are you saying?… this must be you

    MAYBE THERE IS SOMETHING ABOUT YOU THAT IS ATTRACTING THESE loser black WOMEN or loser asian women a goldiggers a goldigger, but do not subject MY SISTERS and MY BROTHERS to these categories BECAUSE I LOVE MY BLACK MAN regardless of hair texture, skin complextion, or status and whenever I am shopping or out and about and I see a black man doing his “thang” working or looking handsome in a beautiful suit I LET HIM KNOW IT! ! ! I am possesive of my Black men and proud but you… no offense kind of reminded me of the black men that make me re-think if i should encourage or bash…you do realize you make black women want to bash black men because of all those things you said…

    please dont lump me and all the other black women in the same category…you kno we all are different..from different places..families and I dont know if its me or just in my psychology and sociology books but it does talk about how experience makes you and I and her and him different …unless you believe in that..well we wont get into that…DONT WORRY TOD …YOU GOT MORE COMING!

    also you need to re-evaluate where most of those utterly, RIDICULOUS ideas came from because I love you to much to let you go about saying those FOOLISH FOOLISH things I am appauled at the OBAMA remark about a white women raising a black man …other than James McBride and Obama please tell me some more white women who raised succesful BLACK MEN…and WOMEN are all POWERFUL and strong…its like in this once instance you negate all the success of other black men INCLUDING YOURSELF ..you do realize you insulted your MOTHER!, you should really be ashamed for saying that I was taken aback …like you struck a nerve…that angry black women sure is coming out now …but all in all Im here to learn from you so dont take offense and please….humor me!

  115. I am a ABW today and decided to find out if there were any blogs out there for me to vent…that is when I found you. Thank God there is a you!

    I just returned from a grad school orientation where the sista’s were sprinkled throughout at least 100 non-traditional attenders. Roughly 6 of us there. I was excited to know about my new school and get busy. There was a little nerves and anxiousness in the air because we are all older and taking this journey together. We were told that two grad school classes would meet with their directors in a different room upon completion of the by-laws of the school. So I was more than happy to be in one of those classes and to hopefully meet my classmates, etc. This is when the hell broke loose…

    We were given folders with our syllabi for the introductory course, information about how to set up the email account to submit papers and our name tag, plus some nice give-aways. The director introduced herself and asked that we tell everyone our name, occupation and undergraduate studies. Of the 16 students that were in my class, I and another co-worker of mine were the only black females in the class. As everyone gave their information, I was working it out in my head to make my position sound dignified and reverent when my turn was up. I eloquently said the following: My name is “sone,” and I am an adult educator for (I stated the name of the company) a vocational school and received my undergrad in Business Management.” My co-worker (remember, she is black also) apparently was doing the same thing because her title changed and we both knew it. However, we didn’t say anything about it. We didn’t lie, we just made what we did on our jobs sound exciting. I mean what else could we have done!!! The white people with the undergraduate degrees were directors, leadership developers, operations directors, managers, inclusion and spiritual directors, etc., but we were teachers and recruiters earning minimal-low salaries going to grad school to get jobs like theirs. They have the jobs already that we are going to school to get – - is that an oximoron???!!!

    Because I was there to get all the information that I could before I start class in January, I had to focus on the topic. It was when I walked out with two of my classmates to get in our cars to leave that I saw them driving away in new BMW and Volvo; I drove away in my eleven year old (paid for) Ford Taurus. All the shit that hit the fan in my earlier life just came back at me but in full force. I am an ABW and I am proud of the fact that I see it for what it is. I know that we have a long way to go and we haven’t moved too far from the civil rights days. I say, let’s fight for what is fair and right and not back down. I also say, ALL BLACK PEOPLE UNITE and start our own nation. It is time to stop putting eachother down and to start celebrating our inherent gifts. We need to create great businesses and help others that struggle with the same issues. BLACK MEN STOP…getting into business and creating the same environment that hinders black women from excelling. No military mentalities and good-ole’-boys clubs with fantasy football that is a means to isolate. Remember, your mothers were and still are strong black women that faced far worse mentalities. Don’t ever forget that! Let’s have a continuous love for one another and a continuous lifting of each other up. Let’s recognize our greatness and keep in in alignment with what God sees in us!

    I’M READY TO TAKE IT BACK!!!!

  116. SWF previously wrote:

    I have had several experiences where black women are acting in an inappropriate or rude way and I ask them to stop it and then they get a very hostile, combative attitude. What is making me write you is that last Sunday I was in church and there were two black women behind me that felt it was OK to talk through the entire service. When I turned around to them and asked them to please stop talking, one of the women looked at me, started to shake her head, and said, “Don’t go there.” I then turned back around and they resumed their conversation.

    You can say the same benign thing to dozens of people, but the minute you say it to an ABW, their attitude alone makes it ugly. It’s as if they are waiting for an opportunity to go off.

    And then they tell you, “Don’t go there” as if to intimidate you from speaking.

    (As if they have their hands over ears):
    “LALALALALALA”
    Are we six years old?!!

    Then they wonder why we roll our eyes and they call US prejudice!!

    ABW, just get some good therapy .
    (no, not one where your rage is incited alone, but where your grief can be worked through as well)

    Carrying around that anger isn’t good for you, and it isn’t good for anybody else either.

    Yeah, I know, many of you will post that this is just another SWF who wants to repress or quiet BW.

    And you’re right–I do. When your anger has to do with you and your issues.

    You’re not different because your black. We all have histories to deal with.
    (another chance for you to justify how YOURS is different, but it’s not)

    The question is, “Are you going to let your history poison your interaction with others, or are you going to deal with it?”

    Whatever interaction you choose will create my response to you:
    I’ll either respond warmly and smile, or
    roll my eyes and shake my head and walk away.

    Because I’m not dealing with an ABW (or anyone else) who just wants her rage.

    It’s futile.

    And it’s yours.

  117. Another SWF wrote: “You’re not different because your black [sic]. We all have histories to deal with.
    (another chance for you to justify how YOURS is different, but it’s not)”

    Um… wow. Just wow. I’d direct you to the white privilege post, but this kind of statement is just so damn blind I think it would be futile (and I say that as another SWF, by the way). I mean, geez…. Go read this:

    http://theangryblackwoman.wordpress.com/2006/09/14/things-you-need-to-understand-4/

  118. This is the funniest site I’ve seen in some time. Reading the comments of the fat, angry fools stroking out here is quality entertainment. “Mew, mew…I’m angry and scary! Yeah, dat’s right!” LOL

    Psst…I’m a white male! C’mon and git me! Show me who’s boss! Ooaghhh! Hep me! The Angry Black Woman’s coming to get me! LOL

    The truth is, angry people like you are powerless because you’re angry. No one normal – white/black, male/female, gay/straight – wants to have anything to do with you because you’re a mentally crippled pain in the ass.

  119. ^^ Says the lonely jackass posting on a blog close to midnight on a Friday night.

    Who doesn’t want anything to do with whom? ;-)

  120. Says the nitwit posting near midnight on Saturday, LOL. You’re not the sharpest knife in the drawer, are you?

  121. actually, Angel probably wasn’t up near midnight, but my blog is on Eastern time, regardless of where people post from. Still, you are a sad, lonely person. You might want to attempt counseling.

  122. I think you are FAB! and I like what you have to say. Sometimes you have to go there and take folks too. I am not angry all the time—just when I need to call on it. My goal is to move through the world in peace and love, but sometimes a Sister has to get up from the prayer rug and get the vaseline. So thanks for holding it down and setting it straight! I am adding you to my blogroll. A Sister listed you over at Blogher as one of her favorite sites for 2008.
    Love,
    Babz

  123. we need to stop reverse racism:
    people ar you blind , look at what this woman writes:

    Firstly, ABWs are angry. Anger won’t solve most of the world’s problems, but it will get people who play at being aggressive and dominant to back down quickly. Second, ABWs are black. And we know that most white people are scared of black people. Third, ABWs are women. So, if the person you’re in conflict is a man, isn’t backing down from the anger, and doesn’t flinch at going toe to toe with a black person, being a woman is really useful. He can’t hit you, you’re a woman. If he does, he’s an abuser. If he calls the police on you, they’ll exclaim “You’re frightened of a woman? Grow a set of balls and leave us alone!” Thus, Angry Black Women have the advantage in almost all conflict situations.

    And young lady white people are not afraid of black people , we just to slow to get angry with your kind and prefer to ignore trash like you

  124. don’t understand your last comment angry black woman, please elaborate

  125. ^^^^
    You mean other than the fact that “anonymous” is both sexist and racist while attempting to hide behind the fallacy/nonexistence of reverse racism?

    All of which serve in making that poster nothing but a joke.

  126. I believe reverse racism does exist, but what makes me really wonder is why black people don’t go back to Africa? nobody keeps them here and if you so opressed in America go right ahead build a better life elsewhere

  127. Thanks for continuing the joke joe. Now get back to europe where you belong.

    Go on now! Shoo!

  128. Of course Joe! So we can make it so much better for poor white guys like you, so that you don’t have to have anyone threaten your status, you want for us to go back to Africa.

    You know, our opinion is bothering you more than it’s bothering anyone else. Perhaps hightailing it to Europe would be a much more viable alternative. Besides, After all the blacks are out, then you’re going to want the browns and yellows gone too!

  129. With this said, to add to this entry. I agree. But I am not just angry – I am PISSED.

    And half of the comments remind me why I’m pissed, and that, while the anonymity of the internet has something to do with the people who get ballsy and try to make everything about them, there is a surprising amount of White people that subscribe to this belief.

    And my fiancee – supports my anger 100%. In fact, he’s pissed to the point of action as well. (And he’s just as white as a sheet of paper.)

  130. Let’s also point out that for most black people in the US, there is no “back” to Africa–they were never in Africa! Most black Americans grew up here. Their homes and cultures are here, and they have the right to live in their home country free from racist crap.

  131. I always wonder about that “go back to Africa” crap people say. Or “go back to China,” or whatever your ancestry is. I mean, what happens when the person who says that (say, Joe) meets a Native American?

    Joe: Go back to!… wait…

    Does something click then? Maybe the fact that America doesn’t even belong to white people, by that logic? Go back to where now? Sheesh… it’s such a stupid argument.

  132. ok poor opressed black people I feel for you However you have the same opportunities as everyone else , even more with affirmative action so why asians never complain about opressive white people? asians prefer to study and work hard and prosper in this country , majority of black people on the other hand prefer to feel sorry for themselves well you have Condy Rise or Barak Obbama or Collin Powel they worked hard and achieved a lot and I don’t hear them complaining
    in this country we all have equal chance so grab it and stop whining

  133. *points and laughs at Joe*

    Go back to Europe, you.

  134. Well, he’s clearly never met somebody of Asian descent…

  135. joe:

    There’s this wonderful new invention called punctuation. Try it sometime.

  136. And yet…joe can speak for Asians. A white male can speak for asians. This is truly a first.

    Another idiot demonstrating his privilege.If you shut the hell up and listened to what minorities have to say, you’ll realize that Asians are just as pissed as we are.

  137. Clearly guys you can not argue with my logic, hence all you can do is to insult me. In 15-20 years white people will become a minority in this country then who will you blame?:)
    Actually Angry Black Female I am originally from Europe. I came here 15 years ago when I was 18 years old and had 50$ in my pocket and now I m making 300K and have a PhD and believe me I did not have an advantage over minorities.
    That is why I am so intolerant of people who are trying to use their skin color as an excuse for not doing anything. I have a lot of minority friends, but my friends are well educated and hard working Americans and I don’t hear them complaining about evil white people. According to national statistics Asians are the most prosperous minority group and they are not far behind white people income wise if not ahead of them. Now why do you think they are so successful, well very simple explanation sorry for repeating myself again ,they study hard and work hard.
    As far as I know we have a free public education so why white immigrant from Europe with 50 $ in his pocket and no affirmative action behind him can succeed in this country and more than 50 % of black kids don’t even graduate from high school? hmmm What are your thoughts?:)

  138. Maybe because, as has been well documented in educational studies, teachers have lower expectations of black students and don’t expect them to succeed (or, therefore, pay as much attention to them, help them to pass the class, etc).

    Maybe because, as has also been well documented, companies have discriminatory hiring/promoting practices against blacks.

    Maybe because in this country black women are *still* making only 64 cents to the white man’s dollar, and black men are making 72 cents to the white man’s dollar.

    Maybe because the stereotypes and prejudices surrounding Asian Americans and Black Americans aren’t comparable (I say this as a half-Korean), because Asians are expected to excel academically and have other advantageous stereotypes, especially re: higher education and technology. And while we still experience prejudice, you can’t treat it like the same thing that blacks experience because it’s totally different. So quit making such a dumbass comparison.

    Maybe because it doesn’t matter how goddamn hard you study or how hard you work if your employer doesn’t promote you and instead promotes all the new white guys over your head, as happened to an acquaintance of mine.

    Maybe…

    You know what? Maybe you should go through the required reading section before you open your mouth again.

  139. Instead of playing around where you obviously aren’t wanted, you can do as Ico said, and read the required reading section.

    You are WHITE. It doesn’t matter if you’re from America or Europe, you’re a white male. It doesn’t matter that you’re fresh of the plane, you’re going to get better treatment than a black woman will just because of your race and gender.

    Additionally, AA is something that benefits White Women more than it does many racial minorities. So, instead of trying to fall back on your idea that blacks are lazy, (because you are implying that in your posts) you can instead try the required reading, otherwise, you can do yourself a favor and get out.

    Also, stop trying to make this about you and what you’ve accomplished. If you have enough time to surf the internet, it makes me really wonder if you do have a Ph.D or not.

  140. I love it!

    You believe in reverse racism while dismissing actual racism.

    *falls over laughing*

  141. your reqired readings are bunch of B.S.
    I argue that in american society it does not matter if you are white, black, indian, asian, male or female. What matters is your education and skills.
    Again friend of mine is black with MBA from Harvard Business School . He has a great job and never was discriminated agains because he has great education and great professional skills. Now if you are black or white or asian with no education and criminal historyofcourse I don’t want to hire you.
    As simple as that , get over it and stop complaining.

  142. ^ ^ ^ ^
    BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAhahahahahahaha!

    So it is a Monday. *continues laughing*

  143. I like your blog, and I’m really feelin’ that “Don’t Touch My Hair” t-shirt.

  144. The worst thing about your blog is that you present it as intelligent and thoughtful when you’re perpetuating the very ignorance and hatred you purport to want to see an end to. Ironically, you are as much a part of the problem as everyone you see fit to complain about. You offer no peace and no solution. If there truly was an end to racism you, and so many others, would lose your sense of self. What would you be angry about? How would you identify yourself then? More immediately, what positive light do you shine now?

  145. Darren:

    1. Where do you see hatred?

    2. I actually have offered solutions to the problems I address. You obviously haven’t read much of the site.

    3. You assume that my battle against racism is the only thing that gives me a sense of self. Typical reaction of the ignorant. You think that just because I have this blog it’s ALL I do and ALL I’m interested in. You never once consider that I am an actual person, with other interests, hobbies, a job, friends, and a career, all of which I care about. Were racism to end tomorrow I would still continue in my job, hang out with my friends, write, read, and in general have a good life which would actually be made better and more fulfilling without the bullshit of racism. My “self” isn’t wrapped up in my internet life, though yours may be. Good luck with that.

    4. I consider this blog a positive light. Only people who are afraid of change and benefit from racism see it as overly negative.

    Thanks for playing!

  146. Pwned. :D

  147. 1. The hatred you spread is the worst kind. It’s not bold enough to be forthright, instead opting to act like it has some kind of rational thought. You have statements and pictures on your page that do not send a signal that you want to have friendly discourse, but seek to put white people in a bad light, and in turn, perpetuate hate. No, your too smart to say it out loud, but it’s there – saying it loud. Your required reading, “A Concise History of Race Relations in the USA” – does that promote love and friendliness?

    2. You may be right, I may not have spent enough time reading the site to find your solutions. I did, however, spend about 45 mins. reading before I decided to write. If I can’t find your solutions in 45 mins., how deep are they buried? Please send me the direct links or titles so I can read them.

    3. I assume nothing about you except what you give me on this site. I did cruise around the internet and try to find you and if the angry black woman I found doing radio and press is you, you have made a handy little career out of this oppression you suffer. If it is not you, then some other people seem to be doing fine with their oppression.
    And no, my “self” is not wrapped up in my internet life. I do not have a blog to spread my every thought.

    4. This is the interesting thing and why I wrote to you – you could be a positive light. Through the “anger” you do seem to have intelligent thought. The shame of it is, so many lack the ability for rational thought and are looking for a reason to fight. You are giving them fire and negative energy instead of positive. Please do not misconstrue my intention when I say it is negative. I see no benefit from racism or insulting any group as a whole for the actions of a vocal part of a group.

    If the egos and need to “win” could stop – from both sides – the whole issue could then be discussed and real solutions could be approached.

  148. opting to act like it has some kind of rational thought

    Heh. ABW, you’re just “acting like” you have some kind of rational thought! Actually, it’s all a charade!

    if the angry black woman I found doing radio and press is you, you have made a handy little career out of this oppression you suffer.

    Oh, yeah. How much did you pull down this year, hon? Five bucks? No, wait, let me factor in carfare…I’m going to guess…-50 dollars. Do I win?

  149. Veronica, you always win.

    But yeah, I have done NPR a few times and been mentioned on other blogs and websites and such, and I wasn’t actually paid for any of that. Do you see ads on this site? Only the thing about the store to the left, and I have sold exactly 4 shirts, so obviously all my angry blackness is turning a profit!

    But to get serious for a moment.

    1. The hatred you spread is the worst kind. It’s not bold enough to be forthright, instead opting to act like it has some kind of rational thought.

    I have to say, you are about the first person who has ever accused me of not being forthright. That’s truly a new one on me. It’s especially interesting because just this morning I was contemplating writing a post on how Angry does not equal Hateful. Now you’ve illustrated the great need for it.

    I don’t hate. I get angry about things that are unjust, unfair, and wrong. How is that hateful? I point out the systematic racism in this country and the individual instances thereof. How is that hateful? I don’t allow people to get away with bullshit. How is that hateful? That you would come here and tell me that the things we do – raising awareness of and fighting against racism, sexism, and prejudice is hateful because we’re not doing it politely? That smacks of racism, sexism, and prejudice.

    You have statements and pictures on your page that do not send a signal that you want to have friendly discourse

    And yet I still manage to have friendly discourse with people who actually engage me intellectually and aren’t just closet bigots. Go fig.

    but seek to put white people in a bad light

    Well, the only white people who end up being in a bad light are the ones who belong there. In case you hadn’t noticed, there are several white readers and commenters on this blog. And they are regularly angry right along with me when they see prejudice. Those white people aren’t in a bad light. White people who don’t do or say things that reveal their racism aren’t in a bad light. So basically what you’re whining about is me saying bad things about bad people. Go you.

    and in turn, perpetuate hate.

    I actually see calling out people who do bad things and saying “Hey, quit that” as perpetuating non-hate. The main message of this blog is: Don’t be Racist or Sexist or Prejudiced. I would say that this message is against hate. So tell me again how I’m forcing others to hate?

    And again, you are confusing Hatred with Anger. Those are not the same things.

    Your required reading, “A Concise History of Race Relations in the USA” – does that promote love and friendliness?

    It’s meant to illustrate a truth. If the truth it illustrates makes YOU uncomfortable and causes YOU to hate people, then that’s not actually my bad, is it?

    #2 – Every time we speak out about an incidence of racism, sexism, or prejudice, we are offering a solution. the solution is: quit doing this bad shit, yo. Every time I post about something heinous and wrong I say: this has got to stop. In fact, I don’t even really need to say it anymore, because it’s implied and most intelligent folks get that. The solutions I offer up are: people, quit acting like assholes.

    For further information, please take a look at the “Monday Debate” and “Things You Need To Understand” categories.

    #3 – Also, if you’ve actually read any of my press or listened to my appearances on NPR or the DogHouse, you’ll notice that I make no mention of being oppressed nor spend any time wallowing in my oppression parade. In fact, I don’t think I talked about oppression at all. Mainly I talked about the issues in the news, or how to balance comedic/artistic freedom and inappropriate jokes, or how I feel about Stargate: Atlantis. So, if you’re found something to the contrary, please point it out. I’m sure we’d all like to see.

    But damn, the fact that you’re already creepily stalking me doesn’t give me confidence that this is going anywhere but downhill.

    4. This is the interesting thing and why I wrote to you – you could be a positive light. Through the “anger” you do seem to have intelligent thought.

    and I’m going to stop you right there. being angry and having intelligent thought are not mutually exclusive. It’s true that sometimes, when people get mad, they don’t always think straight. But it’s also true that anger can help clarify things for a person. And just because I’m angry doesn’t mean i spend all my time frothing at the mouth. You seem to still have a problem understanding how the internet works. Just cuz I call myself ABW doesn’t mean I spend all my time stomping around like the Hulk.

    So, to reiterate: a person can be angry and intelligent at the same time. A person can be angry and be a force for positive change all at once. One can be rational and thoughtful and still find bullshit annoying. The fact that you appear to be saying that none of this is true makes me question your intelligence.

    Sorry not to be positive there, but whenever walking cliches like you come by I find it hard not to be dismissive.

  150. “Just cuz I call myself ABW doesn’t mean I spend all my time stomping around like the Hulk.”

    Hee hee. Best. Mental image. Ever. :D
    Is it bad of me that I seriously think it would be fantastic if you did? Really, some of the stuff I see out there does make me want to go, “HULK SMASH!!!”

  151. Just cuz I call myself ABW doesn’t mean I spend all my time stomping around like the Hulk.

    But your Hulk impression is what I like best about you!

  152. Man! I can feel the love, the desire for peace, harmony and oneness coming at me. You ARE the angry black woman!

    I never suggested that you couldn’t be angry and intelligent at the same time. Actually, I said the exact opposite. As a matter of fact, I said many other things that you chose to not address. Your assumptions about what I think are interesting. I want you to know I am someone who wants to have a clear, educational back and forth and through your insults, assumptions and decision to cherry pick parts of my statements to ridicule for the entertainment of your “believers,” you have failed have at what you propose to be your solution –

    “The solutions I offer up are: people, quit acting like assholes.”

    I am not surprised that you have people who want to have friendly discourse in spite of your delivery. This is a subject people want dead and many polite, intelligent people are anxious to discuss it with anyone, especially those who do not seem friendly.

    I am not creepily stalking you. You actually have it on your site that if anyone wants to find you, they can with very little searching. I hadn’t even thought of it until I read it. I am open to you and followed your suggestion.

    I realize I am a “walking cliche,” but you failed to address some of my statements. I will send them again and ask you to comment:

    1. If the egos and need to “win” could stop – from both sides – the whole issue could then be discussed and real solutions could be approached.

    2. so many lack the ability for rational thought and are looking for a reason to fight. You are giving them fire and negative energy instead of positive.

    The zeal with which you approach this site is admirable, but you should realize not everyone’s intelligence is on your level and while I recognize the difference between anger and hate, many do not. By putting this site up you have thrust yourself into a leadership position and that comes with responsibility. See, I do understand how this internet thing works, and I also understand that people follow the lead of a strong-minded person, which you obviously are. Calling out heinous actions is admirable, but having that “go directly to jail card” at the top of your page is only perpetuating negative energy. As does the “A Concise History of Race Relations in the USA”. It WAS a truth. There have been many actions taken since those things happened. What purpose is served by having those things on here? At what point do we move forward? Before you can say it – I’m not dismissing or downplaying the history of, or incidence today of, racism. But if you continue to bring up past wrongs, you will never get past them. So continue to discuss specific happenings today without dwelling on something that can’t be undone.

    Please note I did not number my statements and highlight your comments accordingly. That can only create tit-for-tat and I am not here to win. Initially, I got caught up in the heat of the angry black woman and lost myself in her anger and delivery. That is not me. I would like to have a real, non-insulting back and forth but this is not the right place for that. It wouldn’t be exciting enough.

    Thanks for letting me play and good luck!

    Maybe I’ll buy a t-shirt – I’ve always liked the number 5.

  153. Darren- You’re a white guy, right? You’re whiteness is leaking from everything that you wrote. Of course, please do realize that this observation is coming from a white woman. And also note that when I use the word white, like ABW, I do not equate white with bad.

    You say that if we give up our ego and need to win on both sides, then maybe we could discuss things and come to solutions. I want to know what this looks like. For me, the need to win means I reach the goal of ending racism. So if I give up that need to win, then what is my goal? To halfway end racism? To accept bigotry only some of the time? To agree with people who are racists that racism, on occasion, is okay? None of that is acceptable. Now I know you may say that is taking what you said too far. But really, come on! This is one fight where the need to win is SO important.

    Also, you speak about the importance of history and then dismiss it as past wrongs that we need to move past. I find this logic hard to swallow. First, history does matter- you stated this as well. Second, history is NOT in the past, but alive and well in our present and in our future. Past wrongs- I imagine that you are speaking of slavery- may have happened in the past, but the effects of those “past wrongs” are still felt today and will continue to be felt hundreds of years from now. Why? Because our entire society in the US is rooted in these so-called past wrongs. We have build our lives around these actions for the last few hundred years.

    I have a book reccomendation for you about the interaction of the past and present- it is called Racial Formation in the US From the 1960s to the 1990s (2nd edition) by Michael Omi and Howard Winant.

    And as for the comment of this site giving folks negative energy, let me give you my viewpoint. I, as a WHITE woman, do not get that feeling from ABW’s site. I enjoy the humor to which she approaches topics, the intelligence she weaves into her posts and comments, and the patience- yes patience- she has for the never-ending stream of white people who use HER site for their racist rampages and distaste for strong Black women.

  154. Darren, you wrote that ABW “cherry pick parts of my statements to ridicule for the entertainment of your ‘believers’” — like, what, we’re sheep or something? Like a cult following blindly agreeing with our fearless leader?

    While it’s a fun idea, it’s really not the way this site works. For example, this “believer” is another white woman who has gotten into plenty of debates here with both bloggers and commenters. Yes, I was entertained by her response to you — that’s because I happen to think your comments reveal glaring ignorance about the way racism works.

    Especially re: this statement: “if you continue to bring up past wrongs, you will never get past them. So continue to discuss specific happenings today without dwelling on something that can’t be undone.”

    In the first place, everything transgressingengineer said about the past’s influence on the present. In the second, er… have you read the site? Did you *really* look around for 45 mins? Cause I’m pretty sure most of ABW’s posts have to do with current issues and current events, with racism and its effects on people of color right now, today.

    You claim that you are “not here to win,” that you like a reasonable discussion, but your comments ooze condescension. Furthermore, you seem to be making an awful lot of assumptions about ABW, this site, its readers, and its general effects in the world. For me as a WHITE WOMAN, I have found the site enlightening and invaluable — a “positive light” and one of many “real solutions” to the ever-present problem of racism (and sexism, and prejudice) in our world.

  155. Now that I’m back from having a life outside of being angry and black, I can address some of your concerns, darren. Though my commenters have done a bang up job already!

    1. If the egos and need to “win” could stop – from both sides – the whole issue could then be discussed and real solutions could be approached.

    Yeah, I’m not sure what exactly you’re on about with this one. The need to ‘win’ what? the argument? Well, if the argument is: “Racism exists and is bad,” against, “No, it doesn’t exist, you’re too sensitive,” then, yes, one side DOES need to win because the attitude of the latter is completely wrong and responsible for much badness today.

    Winning this argument isn’t about my damn ego, it’s about making an important change in the mindset of a majority of people. A mindset that is, frankly dangerous.

    As I say in the post about the Race Card: this isn’t a game to me. It may be a game to you, but that’s because your stake in it isn’t all that high. Which makes most of what you say on the subject very nearly useless.

    2. so many lack the ability for rational thought and are looking for a reason to fight. You are giving them fire and negative energy instead of positive.

    You know, of the people who come to this site, I’d say 80% of the ones who stick around for more than a minute do NOT lack the ability for rational thought. That other 20% is not filled with stupidity and hate and ignorance because of me. They showed up that way. And honestly, if I were to cater to people who can’t think rationally? I would spend my whole day herding stupid. I just don’t work that way.

    Calling out heinous actions is admirable, but having that “go directly to jail card” at the top of your page is only perpetuating negative energy.

    The only people who feel negatively about that card are those who don’t find it kinda funny, and those who don’t find it kinda funny are *usually* folks who are already looking to dislike me because o the name of this site.

    That image is up there because it says a lot about how little I’m willing to be nice and polite about racism around here. I’m a blunt person. I don’t try to ease into discussing racism. My header is an element of that bluntness. It may not make you feel warm and fuzzy upon seeing it, but that’s okay. Being uncomfortable is an important step to erasing racism in our times.

    At what point do we move forward? Before you can say it – I’m not dismissing or downplaying the history of, or incidence today of, racism. But if you continue to bring up past wrongs, you will never get past them.

    As others already said, this is a stupid statement. The aphorism “Those who forget the lessons of history are doomed to repeat them” isn’t just something pretty people like to stitch onto pillows, my friend. It’s a truth. To understand where we are right now, we have to look at how we got here. the concise history cartoon is actually about the NOW, not the past. It illustrates how incredibly stupid it is for white people to say “You blacks are just looking for a hand up. *I* got here on my own, why can’t you?” when the reality is that white people got where they are by standing on the backs of blacks and other minorities. It’s referencing the past in order to talk about the present. That you don’t get that is sad. Really sad.

    We cannot talk about racism today without talking about the past. We, as human beings, do not exist in an ever-present Now in which nothing that happened yesterday or last week or last month or last year or last decade or last century doesn’t matter. Trying to stop people from analyzing the past is basically just trying to cover up things you find uncomfortable. You want us to believe that things what came before are not relevant. But generally the only people who feel that way are the ones who damn well know it’s relevant but are ashamed.

    Initially, I got caught up in the heat of the angry black woman and lost myself in her anger and delivery.

    I love how it’s MY fault that you were angry and did/said things that make you ashamed now. Really. That is too hilarious.

    I would like to have a real, non-insulting back and forth but this is not the right place for that.

    Actually, this IS the place for that. Want to know the secret to how that happens? Don’t start out here with a condescending tone and ditch the white privilege. That will help.

  156. You know, I like the card, but I don’t like it as much as I like “probably some dumb shit you did, white girl.”

  157. Hey! Why did you delete the words “white girl” from that quote?

  158. To make it more all encompassing… sometimes white guys do dumb shit, too ;)

  159. Here is my story. I am an irritated white woman a lot of the time. I think media images are killing our little girls and giving them the idea that the need to be anorexic and the next contestant on the Bachelor. But I don’t have anything new to say about this…
    I did notice a poster above had a complaint about liberal whites. I wanted to make the comment that there is no way we know what it is like to be black but we do think Bill O’Reilly is a douche bag hate monger, too.
    I grew up as a Republican in Oregon (our town was totally white.) I did not know what racism was until I joined the army and moved to the South. I didn’t know what sexism was until I became a paratrooper.
    As soon as I got out of the army I became a democrat. From living with enough black women(in the army) I have a pretty good idea why they are pissed and I think they are right to demand power.
    But you need to know that even if liberals don’t get it, we actually go out of our way to try to understand. We are actually conscious enough to care about your complaints and try to do the right thing. You don’t want to slap a stereotype on all of us.

  160. Here is my story. I am an irritated white woman a lot of the time. I think media images are killing our little girls and giving them the idea that the need to be anorexic and the next contestant on the Bachelor. But I don’t have anything new to say about this…
    I did notice a poster above had a complaint about liberal whites. I wanted to make the comment that there is no way we know what it is like to be black but we do think Bill O’Reilly is a douche bag hate monger, too.
    I grew up as a Republican in totally white town. I did not know what racism or sexism was until I joined the military and moved to the South.
    As soon as I got out of the army I became a Democrat. From living with enough black women(in the army) I have a pretty good idea why they are pissed and I think they are right to demand power.
    But you need to know that even if liberals don’t get it, we actually go out of our way to try to understand. We are actually conscious enough to care about your complaints and try to do the right thing. You don’t want to slap a stereotype on all of us.

  161. SIX CHEERS FOR ICO-and I take issue with the fact that white people assume all Asians are on easy street with six-figure incomes, three storied mansions, and two SUV’s when that ain’t the case.
    1. What about the Asians working and striking in sweatshop’s for peanuts.
    2. The information professionals in indentured slavery in Mississippi.
    3. The Asian professional that faces the glass ceiling at work.
    4. The recent Asians that did not come from good backgrounds with money and education that struggle here now.
    DAMMIT, I know you get the picture here ICO.

    Just for observation’s sake, though-a poster was saying in the future when whites are a minority who will they blame for their problems. My question is,

    1. How does this change the problems minorities have with things enough white people do now, and how does scapegoating minorities for all their problems solve theirs?

    Another observation is that money and education is all that matters in America. My other question is this,

    If this is all that counts in America, why is it that a white man without a high school degree and a criminal background able to get a job quicker than a black man with a college degree and no criminal background? Answer me that, smartasses?

    I am the other ABW but shout out to the blogger?

  162. “DAMMIT, I know you get the picture here ICO.”

    Well… sometimes. ^^;; I’m still learning to be conscious of my own white privilege (which I grew up with despite the half-Korean blood). I’m very grateful to ABW for this site. It has broadened my awareness a lot, and I am trying to work that into my art, my writing, my teaching (whenever I get back to it).

    And right on with the assumptions about Asians being on easy street! Particularly Asian women, with all the objectification and degradation as submissive, exotic toys for white men to enjoy.

  163. “minorities, poor people, immigrants (both illegal and legal), and other marginalized parties are still treated like the gum on the shoe of the white, male power structure in this country ”

    I am all of those, as well as white and male. This statement is both sexist and racist. My god you have NO IDEA what you’re talking about!

  164. ^ ^ ^ ^
    Translation: WWAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!

  165. Angryguy, you’re just an idiot.

    As long as you are white and male, you aren’t exactly a minority in this country. Racism and power still work to your benefit.

    Before you spout out buzzwords that you have no clue on, read EVERYTHING.

  166. White people kill me. Sometimes their arrogance is amusing, other times it’s downright disgusting.

    I love it how they cling to “inclusiveness” when they’re trying to make a point, as in “Why don’t you people (black people) just call yourselves “Americans”…why do you call yourselves African Americans…why don’t you just forget slavery, Jim Crow, Civil Rights Movement, and just be “American”…why do you all give your children made up or African names, why this, why that…”

    Strange that white people “yearn” for “inclusiveness”, yet in 2008, the noose became popular again…and although it wasn’t hung around our necks, it WAS hung over our desks, and left lying on our desks, in workplace offices across the country. White people claim to want inclusiveness, yet cannot or will not see how they play a part in the racism and injustice that still permeates this country.

    White folks don’t want inclusiveness, they want control…any human being who would question a grown ass group of men and women as respects what they CHOOSE to call themselves, has some serious control issues.

  167. you know…after reading an article on here id like to reformulate some of my past statements…im not asking people to censor themselves..but by saying stay objective and avoid “off-putting remarks…” i guess i am. see where i’m coming from is that im young enough to not really have power over who gets loans, housing, scholarships, jobs, ect…im only old enough to recognize how i treat and interact with people. i get offended with implications that i’ve raped and oppressed people–if someone accused you of such things, that woudn’t make you feel good either.

    that doesn’t mean these concerns shouldn’t be voiced, however. so i guess i’ll just have to bite the bullet on that, but it still doesn’t seem fair or constructive to me, personally.

    most people, more specifically white people, who come on here have at least some idea of the struggle and are trying to understand and do their best to help. after all, it’s not like kkk members frequent these boards. it’s generally people trying to understand and help. if a friend is helping you move your couch and you’re trying to maneuver through a doorway, you wouldn’t berate and belittle them would you? i’d have to believe you’d politely tell them the right way.

    sorry, dealing with bigotry isn’t the same as moving a couch, but i think you get my point.

  168. I am doing an art exhibition and would love for you guys to host a panel discussion about recreating the African American Family. As black women we have been pushed out of our community and made nomads of this country. Separating us from our men. Our family and our children. The name of the exhibit is called “Afro Gypsy” More info to come… is there a direct email address I can send you about the traveling show?

  169. Egad! I’m pretty sure I’m lost. I am exactly what probably makes you angry…short, fat, middle-aged white woman who is oblivious to the world at least
    38% of the time. Living in South Dakota…yeah, pretty much the center of whiteness…I am a bit sheltered and I’m not real angry, but I love your site. Dripping with sarcasm and anger is great and add the fact you are a super writer and intelligient, I’m flippin’ glad I’m lost. To tell you how racially behind the times we are, I can still remember the first time I saw a beautiful little girl with the hair you don’t want touched…love the tee by the way…She was gorgeous and I was so jealous I couldn’t look like her and pissed because I sunburned every day of my life. Yeah, we are more racially diverse now in the northern plains, but I still have a lot of Mary Kay makeup I didn’t realize was for bronze/black skin when I first started…We just don’t have enough Angry Black Women around here…I guess…just me…a not so angry white bitch…Again…love your provocative site.

  170. I love your rules!!!!!! Can I borrow some?

    i am new to the bsphere and it was great to stumble into your space.

    what i will say is i spent many many years being an ABW. When people would ask me why i was so angry i would ask them if they were paying attention.

    then a strange thing happened. I was targeted and finally forced out of my job at a supposedly progressive and feminist organization. My transgression was one made by many black women in the work force (and in life)- i spoke the truth about the unethical practices that were killing the spirit of the organization.

    things were very bleak for me back then. i almost lost my home and was out of work for months. it was then that i discovered the law of attraction-i’d always flirted with metaphysics but it was until 2004 that my life began to change.

    at any rate- now i am back in the battered women’s movement and beleive me there is much to be angry about- but i cant seem to conjer it up any more! i am still opinionated but not nearly as angry as i used to be – its like all that metaphysical “stuff” squashed some of my anger and replaced it with a desire for peace

    the funny thing is, even though i am more peaceful i sometimes wonder if i am living in a state of denial-other times i feel like i lose some of my fire with each passing year

    its a mystery.

    anyway, sis keep doing what your doing!

    z

  171. Angry
    Never

    I am a 30 year old single mother of 2. I grew up in a house with a mother who loved drugs, parties, and men more than my brothers and me. As a little girl I watched my father beat the crap out of my mother and was molested by my step-father. I didn’t graduate from high school because; I became a mother at 16, and decide to work full-time to provide for my son and myself. I will never consider myself to be angry.

    I have 2 sons by two of Indiana’s worst dead beats dads. I work a crappy job, which I have been on for the past 8 years. My hours are being cut more and more everyday prices of food and gas continue to rise while quantities and qualities continue to fall and I still don’t qualify for any type of public assistance. I pay for health insurance and can’t afford to go to the doctor. My credit is bad from hospital bills and other little dumb miscellaneous depts… I’m still not angry

    I continue to watch my grandmother (the love of my life) dwindle; mind and body because of alzimers. Because of her I will never be angry. For she taught me to remain strong, hopeful, prayful, motivated, determined, clear minded, humble, hard working, inspirational, eager to teach and be taught, passionate, encouraged, confident, secure, convinced, positive, enthusiastic, keen, excited, willing and ready, modest, unassuming, down-to-earth, buoyant, cheerful, lighthearted, unbent, etc…..Never angry

  172. So much hatred, eating away the life in our souls…

  173. When i first came across this site i became very interested! I tought to myself “wow a powerful black woman is educating people of all kinds” But then i realized that other opinions which contradicted the ABW’s thoughts were immediately discouraged, i was disappointed. I sat here and read this entire blog dating back to 2006. I read the opinions of those like Steven, Angel H.,ABW, Juan, Darren, joe and others. People like Steven and others who told the angry black woman to just move on perhaps did not have that right because they have not experienced what she has. But at the same time she had a negative reaction to what he said, she completely shut off his thoughts and opinions and basically said “You don’t know anything, I AM right” and not in those exact words. Instead of asking him why he felt in such a way and getting him to comprehend why she feels the way she does. So in my own personal opinion…ABW, that’s defeating the cause. Yes perhaps you’re not here to debate psychologically with someone like him, but you can’t offer solutions if you’re not able to acknowledge others. I am a 26 year old college black woman and i am NOT angry. My Sista, i have been descriminated against many times, i have been believed to have less accomplishment capacity compared to other races. Am i angry? NO…becuase i am persuing(and with great success) a carreer 10x’s higher than that of those who doubted me. I am on top of my game. I have a question for those Angry black women, do you feel that all blacks are loud, ghetto, and less educated? NO, right?…well my sistas, the same way you preach those views you should preach that not all white people are the same! That same white person that may have denied you an opportunity in the past because of your race or judged you unfairly, is not the same white person that you will be faced with in the future. And if you take that negative belief with you, you take a great part in creating and fueling those “stereotypes” you yourself are trying to defeat. My SISTAS we all know our people were enslaved and treated horrendously but thankfully it came to END!!! Why are you blaming and taking your anger out on todays white man? Where they the one’s holding a whip to your back?Many of our people say “we don’t have have the same opportunity that the white man does”….THE HELL WE DO!, i am 6 months away from becoming a Microbiologist….And you know what if you ever feel like you’re not getting an equal opportunity….well guess what you gotta keep your head up and try elsewhere! If you come across someone who is being racist towards you, just laugh at their ignorence, because that’s what that person is, an ignorant human being which attempts to judge you knowing exactly nothing about you…he judges you off of assumption…. Don’t you know that our people suffered to get to where we are now? Don’t you know that our people put their lives on the line for our generation? People who hold on to that anger and refuse to let go are making sure that the stuggle our ancestors went though was all in VEIN!! I will never forget our people’s enslavement and i will make sure our future kids know, but i will not let it choose my future or create the type of person i am.Many of you ABW might be saying right now “well there’s people treating me bad now, i have a right to be angry”….you have the right to be angry if you choose to….but you will carry that anger with you for a long time and blogging will never be enough to help you release your anger! Till this day i bump into somebody who treats me unfair, even if it is indirectly, but guess what, i let it GO…because i am too smart of a person to let someone elses view of me have any affect on who i know i am. I seen previous blogs about black men leaving their women, and not having jobs..and too many kids….Sistas don’t try to block the sun with one finger, some of our men ARE like that, and you know it!….but guess what…not ALL of them are like that…why should we get angry when someone says this….Previously someone stated that we comlain about our men being low lifes, and “letting” them be that, but yet we wanted the thug with the gold tooth….well guess what that’s true as well, if you’re going to choose a man with those qualities, don’t complain about the way he treats you or the life style you live. . I am dating a wonderful black man with goals and dreams, and he isn’t “white washed” either. We know we are black and we enbrace it to the fullest. We have had other people of our own race tell us we were “trying” to be like the white man simply becase we have a good education and speak without slang. Well our own black people cry about how we are stereotyped as loud and ghetto but yet when a black person makes a change our own same black people do not support us. I AM NOT white…nor do i wish to be, I AM black and proud. When i come across a racist white person (which will happen) in the future i will not pass on the hatred they pour on me toward another white person…it is time to move on!…many of you “angry” black women can attack everything i say after i post this….if that’s the case so be it, keep ur anger, if not you can open your mind and choose to be better than that. I have no intensions of returning to this blog, so for anyone who wants to reply to me negatively, don’t waste you fingers…i won’t be seeing it….have a good life everyone and god bless♡

  174. Thank you for this space. It is much needed in a world where black women’s issues do not matter and our voices are silenced. Shirley Chisholm once said, “black women are a part of everyone else’s agenda but our own”.

    Personally, I embrace the moniker Angry Black Woman because it comes packed with a powerful history. A history of rebellion, resistence, resiliency and resolve. From Phyllis Wheatley to Harriet Tubman to Sojourner Truth to Ida Wells Barnett, to Rosa Parks to Fannie Lou Hamer to Shirley Chisholm to Barbara Jordan to Maxine Waters to Gwen Ifill…and the names stretch towards infinity. Call me “angry” and I’d say, “damn right”!

    If black women were more angry these days, we wouldn’t have one of the highest rates of HIV/AIDS and domestic violence. If black women were more angry, thug rappers and their white enablers wouldn’t be getting filthy rich off our backs and that of our communities. If black women were more angry. mothers wouldn’t be burying their sons and daughters because of senseless gang violence. If black women were more angry, feminism wouldn’t dare assume that black women who are supporting Obama are doing so because of race.

    Thank you again for sharing this sacred space.

    Peace, The Vixenne

  175. You go, Angry Black Woman.

    There appears no end to it, what there is for people of color to righteously rage against…And white people need to get upset about it, too. No matter how many disrgruntled , clueless white people there are who ask, “So what do *they* have to be so mad about? Why do *they* make everything about race?” As if everything weren’t already made into “about race” by white privilege, as if anger were not an utterly appropriate, human, loving response to systematic dehumanization.

    And i say this, not as a person of color myself, but as the Euro grandma of a little man of African and Native American as well as Euro descent. He’s just three months old, and already I’ve had to tell someone not to call him a monkey.

    No, not Amanda Marcotte, but someone who probably also didn’t seem to learn anything about why and how that “savage hunga-bunga Africa” imagery is not, um, the essence of progressiveness. Three months old, and the racial profiling has already begun…

  176. Hey ABW- love the website

    This may be a bit personal, but from one black woman to another, ” When”s the last time you had some awesome, angry, blow your back out ,toe curling sex with a black man?

    I know, we have much bigger fish to fry as black women, but it’s friday night, I’m at home with a horrible sore throat, it’s that time of the month and I have election coverage fatigue.
    I would say peace to you ABW, but with out justice, I know you don’t want it.

    Have a good evening anyway.
    ucsister1

  177. ? @ ucister1

    ABW, just discovered your site, and i’ll be sure to read more, seems like high quality….

  178. Black Woman(not angry), on August 2nd, 2008 at 8:46 pm Said:
    When i first came across this site i became very interested! I tought to myself “wow a powerful black woman is educating people of all kinds” But then i realized that other opinions which contradicted the ABW’s thoughts were immediately discouraged, i was disappointed. I sat here and read this entire blog dating back to 2006. I read the opinions of those like Steven, Angel H.,ABW, Juan, Darren, joe and others. People like Steven and others who told the angry black woman to just move on perhaps did not have that right because they have not experienced what she has. But at the same time she had a negative reaction to what he said, she completely shut off his thoughts and opinions and basically said “You don’t know anything, I AM right” and not in those exact words. Instead of asking him why he felt in such a way and getting him to comprehend why she feels the way she does. So in my own personal opinion…ABW, that’s defeating the cause. Yes perhaps you’re not here to debate psychologically with someone like him, but you can’t offer solutions if you’re not able to acknowledge others. I am a 26 year old college black woman and i am NOT angry. My Sista, i have been descriminated against many times, i have been believed to have less accomplishment capacity compared to other races. Am i angry? NO…becuase i am persuing(and with great success) a carreer 10x’s higher than that of those who doubted me. I am on top of my game. I have a question for those Angry black women, do you feel that all blacks are loud, ghetto, and less educated? NO, right?…well my sistas, the same way you preach those views you should preach that not all white people are the same! That same white person that may have denied you an opportunity in the past because of your race or judged you unfairly, is not the same white person that you will be faced with in the future. And if you take that negative belief with you, you take a great part in creating and fueling those “stereotypes” you yourself are trying to defeat. My SISTAS we all know our people were enslaved and treated horrendously but thankfully it came to END!!! Why are you blaming and taking your anger out on todays white man? Where they the one’s holding a whip to your back?Many of our people say “we don’t have have the same opportunity that the white man does”….THE HELL WE DO!, i am 6 months away from becoming a Microbiologist….And you know what if you ever feel like you’re not getting an equal opportunity….well guess what you gotta keep your head up and try elsewhere! If you come across someone who is being racist towards you, just laugh at their ignorence, because that’s what that person is, an ignorant human being which attempts to judge you knowing exactly nothing about you…he judges you off of assumption…. Don’t you know that our people suffered to get to where we are now? Don’t you know that our people put their lives on the line for our generation? People who hold on to that anger and refuse to let go are making sure that the stuggle our ancestors went though was all in VEIN!! I will never forget our people’s enslavement and i will make sure our future kids know, but i will not let it choose my future or create the type of person i am.Many of you ABW might be saying right now “well there’s people treating me bad now, i have a right to be angry”….you have the right to be angry if you choose to….but you will carry that anger with you for a long time and blogging will never be enough to help you release your anger! Till this day i bump into somebody who treats me unfair, even if it is indirectly, but guess what, i let it GO…because i am too smart of a person to let someone elses view of me have any affect on who i know i am. I seen previous blogs about black men leaving their women, and not having jobs..and too many kids….Sistas don’t try to block the sun with one finger, some of our men ARE like that, and you know it!….but guess what…not ALL of them are like that…why should we get angry when someone says this….Previously someone stated that we comlain about our men being low lifes, and “letting” them be that, but yet we wanted the thug with the gold tooth….well guess what that’s true as well, if you’re going to choose a man with those qualities, don’t complain about the way he treats you or the life style you live. . I am dating a wonderful black man with goals and dreams, and he isn’t “white washed” either. We know we are black and we enbrace it to the fullest. We have had other people of our own race tell us we were “trying” to be like the white man simply becase we have a good education and speak without slang. Well our own black people cry about how we are stereotyped as loud and ghetto but yet when a black person makes a change our own same black people do not support us. I AM NOT white…nor do i wish to be, I AM black and proud. When i come across a racist white person (which will happen) in the future i will not pass on the hatred they pour on me toward another white person…it is time to move on!…many of you “angry” black women can attack everything i say after i post this….if that’s the case so be it, keep ur anger, if not you can open your mind and choose to be better than that. I have no intensions of returning to this blog, so for anyone who wants to reply to me negatively, don’t waste you fingers…i won’t be seeing it….have a good life everyone and god bless♡

    THIS WAS A GREAT BLOG………….!!!!!!!!!!! All angry black women read this over and over and over and over and over and over and over. YOU spread your own circle of hate–you are the worst kind–YET YOU THINK YOU HAVE JUST CAUSE…..

  179. Than l you for the opportunity to include my two cents

    I should say up front that I am not American. I have been here for a few years and I have had experiences with the ABW. I find that it is worn as a badge or honour. I completely respect the right of all to be disgusted at the ills and evils of the world. Becoming angry in turn is not a solution. We can act for change without acting in anger. Our anger can be channeled into something positive. I honestly believe that we accomplish less when we act in anger.

    I don’t believe that not every expressions of disagreement or every note identifying acts of discrimination is posted in anger. Our host seems a little angry but she has provided a place where we might vent. I am not hereto tell anyone to get over anything because I have not walked in their shoe. I will however restate that acts carried out in anger is most often ineffective. We need to be deliberate and deliberative in our actions. It is only through action that we will b able to make a change. The actions starts with an improved self image. We are not an angry people. We are the foundation of civilization. What other people have endured and continues to endure all that we have? Let us wear that as a badge and continue to strive to reclaim our place.

    Thanks for your time
    Sprinta

  180. This site must be a great catharsis! Props for you doing you.

    Bigotry, ethnic stratification, xenophobia, prejudice, racism, sexism and the countless other terms for exclusivity point to the human race’s preponderance towards superficiality. I mean how can folks be faulted for this? The first thing you notice, if you are not blind, is how something or someone looks. On top of that, our loved ones, environment, culture and even religions help to cloud true independent judgement and thought. It is a rare person who can say that they wait to get to know someone before they pass any judgement on them.

    I am the child of a French-Canadian, Scotch-Irish, English and Sioux father and a Spanish-Filipina, German, Chinese mother. That’s right. A true American! Guess what I look like? Beyond the word “beautiful” you probably thought “WTF?!” Well I basically look like a typical Caucasian, whatever that is! I’m like 1/8th of eight different “races”, I guess! So I’m Everyman…

    My father was in the USAF and as a result we were very nomadic. Most of his “tours” lasted ~3-4 years as do most permanent military assignments. As an elementary aged child in the mid-late 1970′s I did notice that the integration “on base” was much more advanced as compared to “off base”. I had White friends, Asian friends, Black friends, Hispanic friends, Mixed friends– well just “friends” as far as I was concerned. I never, ever thought about coloration or lack thereof, just that you were “cool”, genuine and trustworthy, or you were the opposite. That’ not to say that there was no racism or other “isms” in the military’s version of America, just that it was not as apparent. Trust me there was, and are plenty of bigots in every branch of the military. Of ALL races, but especially the Whites.

    I lived the majority of my primary school years in the South. My father took assignments in Alabama, Florida and South Texas. We lived on base in the first two and in a subdivision a ways from the base in South Texas. Our neighborhood was very integrated. Many of my friends were black, but many were white and hispanic too. I had two asian friends. Most of them didn’t care what ethnicity I claimed and I didn’t care what their government defined “race’ was either. This was during middle school so kids started developing “cliques”. I noticed at school that there were mixed crews, but that many were racially exclusive. Mexican kids, white kids, black kids started where their parents probably left off. I saw and experienced the first signs of intolerance and hatred.

    My father’s last assignment took us to the Philippines. Thank God! I was just starting high school, so I’m glad i didn’t get stuck in Texas, for numerous reasons. My first day of high school in this new place was culture shock. Every single ethnicity you could imagine from different regions of America and sometimes the world was at my school. I liked it.

    Suffice it to say that it was 1982 and I befriended a group of like-minded young cats who all became B-Boys in some form or another. We had Filipino, Mestizo (Half Filipino-Half American), White, Black, Puerto Rican, Mexican, Thai, Vietnamese, Japanese, and more in the various incarnations of my crew. No racism or hate was tolerated. In fact “tolerance” was not tolerated. That was a term used by evil adults, social scientists and other forms of fascists :)! It was pure, unadulterated “ACCEPTANCE” or nothin’ . To this day most Americans still use that limited term– tolerance. Like they’re swallowing some nasty tasting medicine or something. Idiots, hahaha!

    Anywhy, I dated whoever the hell I wanted. Every single “color”. A real African chick and a real Swedish chick and everything in between. Being a B-Boy I was loved by the real and hated by the plastic. The chicks definitely felt me, if you know what I mean. Most crackerish white and asian folk called me a “wanna-be”. That perplexed me because my pasty self was in no way delusional enough to think I could ever have anything but the appearance of a “typical white boy” to the average savage. Albeit I was muy guapo ;)!

    Anyway, I often wondered why it was alright to emulate the staus quo, but anytime you vibed with something outside of that the ignoramuses started with the “labeling”. Would wanting to do a “Black” thing (whatever that means) be so bad? Why? Was I the first non-Black person to do a “Black” thing? What about Blues, Jazz, Rock-n-Roll…

    I did feel that I was human and all of us humans were only one race. Proof of that is the fact we can all procreate and have viable procreating offspring. We aren’t tigers and lions, or donkeys and horses.

    But really with my popularity and skills what the heck did that common thinking mean to me anyway. I thought, for a supposed Caucasian I had all the graf’ writing ability, lyrical acumen as an emcee, rhythm as a popper and breaker and musicality as a d.j. (“turntablist”) of the stereotypical “Black’ B-Boy. It’s not the style it’s the stylist.

    Heck if you were a B-Boy, Black B-Boy sounded weird. I mean in the true (Hip Hop) culture a B-Boy/B-Girl is that and nothing else. Not “that white emcee” or that “dope asian turntablist”. Only you fools who have helped perpetuate social engineering and “assimilation” talk or think like that. Now you know what Eminem was trying to say, but can’t ’cause he’s tainted by the boosheet too. Ridiculous.

    So I’m here to tell you that you can label yourself all you want. Identify yourself as an angry person, or clarify by adding “green” and “hermaphrodite” if you want. America loves caricatures. To those of us who have grown up with no thought of limits based on anything other than ability, knowledge, creativity, uniqueness and SKILL it seems very, uhhh, American and, uhhh, stereotypical White, to tell you the truth.

    The people I chill with are World Citizens and members of the Human Race. Most are just Americans. Not White Americans, Africa Americans, Asian Americans. Just Americans. Trust me, to the myriad Americans out there who think that your cousins in Mexico or Africa or Indonesia are the same as you, you better untwist that notion. You are forever altered once you become an American or your ancestors relocate to this New World. Be proud that you are an American and nothing else. That’s your point of novelty. It IS the best place for us to be or else you’d be living in Siberia, Kosovo, Cairo, or Tokyo. Those places are alright, but they are pretty homogeneous and BORRRING!

    “My” cadre includes physicians, dentists, lawyers, teachers, nurses, entrepreneurs, paramedics, chefs, c.o.’s artists, execs, performers, producers– you catch my drift. Our one culture is based on free thought, leadership, good works, money-making, integrity, responsibility, accountability, wisdom, fairness, altruism, peace, unity, love and havin’ fun! IOW our culture is the true nature of real American culture. Oh and we are all very strong physically, mentally, socially, emotionally and most of all as an amalgam of diversity. The “Hybrid Vigor Theory” is in effect. Step.

    Be careful not to let others define who you are. In the end it’s all just energy, regardless of our travails and endeavors. Make sure you create more positive than negative. Don’t let “the powers that be” dopplegang who we really are or can BE.

    Peace,
    B-Cuz

  181. I’d just like to throw in that those who equate Indigenous enslavement with white enslavement of black people, need to read their histories from another source, and recognize the very limited scope that they are reading their histories from.

    Indigenous peoples (Indians) such as the Cherokees and Seminoles did not engage in slavery out of racist-based presumptions, as white people did. For centuries Indigenous communities accepted workers – “slaves” from other Indigenous groups in times of war and negotiation. Sons and daughters were often traded off to other communities, in exchange for other people. In times of war, the capture and retention of slaves was a very significant element of battle.

    This is NOT, however, the same ideology underpinning white slavery which sought to use it as a very specific tool of oppression meant to hold back people deemed inferior based on skin color. It is crucial to be aware of these vastly differing approaches before grouping people together. Along the same lines, when considering the history texts that you learn Indian peoples were slaveholders, again consider the source. The same texts that inaccurately/incompletely address black history from black perspective also neglect to address history and perspective from Indian perspective.

  182. Oh, and one more topic I’d like to discuss.

    For those (such as Gloria Hopkins) who hope to elide the white privilege that has formed the basis of society today, I have to say I am disappointed. While it is true that there are some very cool (for lack of a better term) white people today who bear no immediate responsibility for generations of racist oppression, they are also people that exist in a position of privilege because they society they reside in was built on the backs of other non-white peoples, and built to the benefit of the future generations of whites. It’s the old “my great great great grandfather was a racist, but I’m not” claim.

    Simply because we would like to imagine a world without race or racism doesn’t make it so. Millions of people the world over (not just America) remain in flux because of the oppressive and racist policies of white colonizers. It’s not enough that white people now say “we’re over race and we’re all sorry” – people are still suffering and struggling under racism that has been imbedded into American political structures. Yes, race has no basis in biological fact, that is true, but it is very real in its consequences and cannot be written off because it’s difficult for whites to take responsibility for their ancestors behavior.

    To those who question Gloria Hopkins Nativeness and assert that they suspect she is definitely “more white” in her mindset, please don’t. One person fell back on the “you don’t know me so don’t judge me”, yet thought it perfectly okay to post a comment “voicing an opinion” that they knew what part of her heritage she was REALLY aligning with (rather, hiding behind “voicing and opinion”). This achieves nothing. There are people who are “100%” Native that agree with the perspectives she espoused about the “end of race”, and accusing her of “thinking white” achieves nothing other than highlighting your own ignorance.

    The goal should not be to attempt to strip people mixed people of their non-white identities who don’t see things in a “Native” or “black” enough way, an in essence re-inscribe the stereotypes of what “Native” or “black” thought should be – that’s very essentially. The goal should be to educate people those who seem to have a limited perspective on the current state of racial issues, and make them into allies…..not enemies.

  183. I just found my way to this site and have been making my way through the Rules and Required Reading. The articles I’ve read so far have been wonderful. Thank you for organizing this site!

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